


The Joy of Parenting

by Ihavegoneinsane, solidsnakessolidcakes



Series: Joy Of Parenting [1]
Category: Metal Gear
Genre: (?), Kaz is a great dad, M/M, Reluctant Parent, anyway have some cute children, doggo obsessed Solid Snake, thats debatable tbh, the twins adopted V as their dad you cant change my mind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2019-10-26 03:54:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 26,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17738528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ihavegoneinsane/pseuds/Ihavegoneinsane, https://archiveofourown.org/users/solidsnakessolidcakes/pseuds/solidsnakessolidcakes
Summary: So what if Kaz decided to parent Eli and Dave when Eli came to motherbase?





	1. Chapter 1

 When Eli arrived Kaz wasn't necessarily thrilled. Sure, he was a little happy that Boss had someone he could call family, but this kid was, well, in a word, crazy.

Eli was vaguely violent, to start off with. Actually, vaguely violent was an extreme understatement.

He was, once again, crazy.

He had no reserves when it came to attacking people, even stealing some people's knives to try and stab them. Him and Ocelot had to stop him on more than one occasion, Boss on even more than the two of them combined.

Eli was even more crazy by the time Kaz had caught him conversing with this strange, psycho child that simply defied the ruled of gravity as if they were nothing.

By that time Kaz had already made arrangements to search for the elusive other twin, and at that point, as soon as he saw the redhead, he sent people off. Even if his sanity was thinning, he wanted to know that the second son of Big Boss was safe.

When Pequod came back with another child Kaz nearly cried of relief.

He was certain this was the child of Big Boss, after all, the boy looked like a carbon copy of him.

He had the exact same strong jaw, only deterred by his childhood. He had the same eye and lip and nose shape, even the same haircut, for god's sake. The only thing that was different were his eyes.

Instead of the clear blue Boss and Eli had the boy had these greeny-blue eyes, flecks of gold and galaxy-like colors streaking them.

Other than that he looked like a copy paste, besides the eye, of course.

Upon seeing each other the twins weren't particularly happy. In fact, they both resented each other for a few weeks while Kaz tried his best to get them to be nice.

When Boss suggested taking one of them on a mission, Kaz snapped.

He didn't know exactly why, but in that moment he decided that he would take David and Eli and whoever the fuck that weird kid Eli befriended and he would raise them how a child should be.

He left the same night.

So that brought us to this situation. Kaz currently limping through the house while his "sons" carried groceries around, putting them away with help from Eli's friend Tretij.

The fact that Kaz had managed to find them a place to stay on such short notice was surprising enough, the fact that it was nice enough to stay even after around a month of them living in one house was like a jump-scare in a horribly realistic movie. Of course, Kaz didn't think that was quite possibly at the time, but he let the analogy stick. Why? Because the author is too lazy to come up with something different.

The fact that he had to parent these children, however, was  like his heart stopping.

He wasn't necessarily a father type, not even a mother type like Ocelot was. But he had already taken the children, so why not take care of them? He might not have been the parent type, but he wasn't a complete asshole.

So he had to raise the kids.

Tretij seemed to be a loner, wanting to stay away from most everyone besides Eli, and even then they disappeared to somewhere quite often. They didn't seem to speak English, only understanding when Eli told them things in some other language Kaz never bothered to identify.

They desperately needed a haircut, exemplified by the fact that he still couldn't tell if they were a boy or a girl. Not to mention they hardly ate, ever. In fact, he hadn't seen them even touch any kind of food and not give it to Eli or David directly afterward. They were horribly thin, and although it wasn't visible under the straitjacket they wore when inside, (which was most of the time) whenever they wore some of Eli's clothes to go out it was terribly baggy on them. And that wasn't just because of the small height difference between the children when Tretij bothered to stand on the ground instead of float.

Meanwhile Eli was the same as ever. Feral was the best word for it. Like a stray cat having to live as a house cat for the first time, although Kaz knew for a fact that he had lived as a normal child before.

This was in stark contrast to his brother, who was perfectly civil and knew every manner in the book, even correcting Eli. This drove the younger twin crazy, of course, but David never relented. This lead to many fights between the two, Dave trying to be civil while Eli seemed to only want a fist-fight and nothing else.

Kaz had to drag the blond off of his brother on more than one occasion.

But he was adjusting surprisingly well, able to gently guide the kids with only mild discomfort.

Of course, there was a reason they had nicknamed him Mother Hen.

Once all the groceries were put away the first thing that happened was loud complaining over boredom. Of course, it was Eli. It was always Eli. The other two were quiet.

So Kaz put on a movie, quite irritated. He had put on the first Pokemon movie, the first thing he found in his tiny bin. It was in Japanese, but it had subtitles. Plus, he was pretty sure Dave knew Japanese, after a long string of curses that Kaz said in his own language the older twin had scolded him. Eli he wasn't so sure, but he could read.

Tretij didn't care at all, though. He just laid himself next to Eli, about halfway in his lap and sat there, seemingly sleeping. It reminded him of a cat.

They all watched the movie in silence, Kaz sitting on the recliner while Eli and Tretij were taking up the couch, Dave at their feet. It was nearing the end when any of them made any noise.

It was the part where Ash got frozen in stone, the part that everyone remembers. You know the one, with Pikachu crying?

The noise that was made was a small sniffle, followed by a louder one. Upon looking over at the three he found the twins crying and Tretij having their face fully in Eli's lap to hide.

It was... a strange sight.

He couldn't help but pull out the old camera he had and take a quick picture when they weren't looking.

Then the speech came. The ramblings of Mewtwo.

At this point the twins had started bawling, Kaz even having to pause the show to get them to calm down.

But that wasn't all he had to do.

He had to carefully pick the two up, scooting Tretij carefully to the side so he could sit down, the twins sitting on his lap and crying into his shirt and or their hands. Meanwhile the redheaded friend loosened their mask so they could slip their hand under and furiously rub their eyes.

Once Eli's loud screaming and sobbing reduced to only soft hiccups he slid off of Kaz's lap, right to Tretij's. He clung to his friend like his life depended on it, sniffling slightly into the thin leather of the straitjacket. Tretij only held him, cradling him as if they were a couple. The thought almost made Kaz smirk, not because it was unlikely but because it was the exact opposite. It seemed far too likely.

He kept holding David until the both of them calmed down, even kept holding him when the movie restarted.

They looked like a family.

 


	2. Chapter 2

Kaz had very few friends. That was the blunt version. Sure, he had many friends, at least back with the Diamond Dogs. But he had left without a word, only a brief note to Boss where he would be staying, in case he needed him so desperately he would drag him out of his home. Or wanted to come live with him.

But he was working on it.

Once he finally got Eli and Dave to go to school, which was a struggle in and of itself, not to mention the tedious negotiations with Tretij, he took up a job. It really was nothing fancy. He would be doing  _costumer service_  for a random company that sold printers. Essentially his worst nightmare. But it paid well, so he went with it.

Currently he was seeing his "kids" off to school, although he knew that the only one that looked remotely related to him was Eli. He had been asked where their parents were before, people assuming that he stole them or some shit.

As he watched the three walk into the school (Tretij was banned from using their powers in public, besides talking to Eli) he felt a presence next to him. He glanced towards it, only to have to look down.

Standing there was a rather short woman, maybe around 5"1, watching her own daughter walk into the school. She looked up and smiled brightly at him, glancing down at his prosthetics before promptly deciding to ignore them, focusing on the sunglasses.

"I like your sunglasses," She said politely, brushing a strand of hair out of her face.

"...Thanks you... I, uh, have sensitive eyes," He shared wearily, shifting his cane in his hand.

"... I haven't seen you here before. Are your kids new?" The question caught him off-guard, somehow.

"Ah-- Yes, but they're... not mine. They were a close friend of mine's who... left them with me, when they... left," He decided carefully, not wanting to share that he had technically stolen them.

"... I'm so sorry... Well, um, what grade are they all in? Are they triplets? And, that redhead didn't look related to the other two," She stumbled awkwardly.

"... The blond and the one with the brown hair are twins, and the redhead is a year younger than them. The blond is named Eli and the brown haired one is named Dave, the redhead is Eli's close friend whose parents... I think died, they're name is Tretij," He shared, deciding to say Tretij was their real first name, since he didn't actually know it.

"Oh... Well, they all seem very nice! How old are they?"

"Eli and Dave are 12, so they're gonna leave this school next year, and Tretij is 11, just barely making it into the same grade as them. They're lucky, because I don't think they speak a lick of English. Pretty sure the only English word they know is Eli."

"Oh, that's cute! Well, my daughter is 11, turning 12 next month. She can likely help them! Uh, my name is Ruth Weindsburg, by the way."

"Oh, well, my name is... Kazuhira Miller. It means "peace" in Japanese."

"Oh! Are you Japanese?"

"Yes, my mother was from Japan."

"Interesting," Ruth nodded, brushing her long brown hair out of her tan face. It reminded Kaz of the old Medic, if he was being honest.

"Well, I'll see you later, Ruth," He decided not to linger on the memory, limping toward the old beat-up car he had gotten.

"Bye, Kazuhira!"

And with that, he drove off. He navigated his way from the rather large elementary school and through to downtown, where his job was. It was his first day, so upon arriving he was immediately greeted by the manager. He had short black hair done up, paired with pale skin.

"Everyone, listen up!" He boomed, "This is the newest addition to our family, his name is Ka-Kawzhiria," He proceeded to butcher the pronunciation.

"Kazuhira," He corrected calmly, shifting away from the hand placed on his back.

"His name is Kazuhira, and he'll be helping with costumer service! Say hello, everyone," The room echoed greeting as if it were a classroom, "Will someone like to show him around?"

The guy that ended up getting assigned had black hair that was tied up in a man-bun, deep brown eyes paired with it. It looked almost like he was staring into his soul. His skin was dark and with little blemishes, but there was a darker patch of skin that looked like a birthmark doing over the side of his nose.

"Hi there, Kazuhira, my name is Ben," He greeted, holding a hand out.

"Hi Ben, call me Kaz," He held out his prosthetic hand to grasp the other.

"Woah, there has got to be a story behind that!" He said, raising his eyebrows.

"Ah, not really," He lied quickly, moving the fingers so the other man could see.

He still wasn't quite used to it, it had been a going away gift from the R&D team when one of them said that he was planning on taking Dave and Eli to love normal lives.

"That's so cool. Man, I wish I could work with robots, they're always so cool," Ben pursed his lips childishly.

"Heh, glad you like it," He shifted slightly.

 "Well, over there is the sales area, and there's the offices, one is for Michael, the manager, and the other is for the human resources guy. His nae is Tony. I don't wanna strew your opinion on him, but he's a bit of an asshole," The raven haired man slowly moved closer to the blond, making Kaz notice that he was a few inches shorter.

"How so?" He asked politely, trying not to be too on-guard, since the guy was just trying to be friendly.

"Ah, he's just so  _full of himself._ Have you ever heard the expression, "He's a Chad"?"

"Um, no, I'm sorry, but I don't think I'm familiar."

"Well, it means a guy that's like, a playboy. Y'know?"

"I... guess?" Really, Kaz didn't. But he could pretend to.

"Well, yeah, that's him. In essentially every sense of it. Except, his name is Tony and he's shrimpy. Like,  _I_ could whip his ass up and down the block and the most exercise I get is walking to the fridge when I get home," He chatted.

"Hmph, sounds like an ass," Kaz pursed his lips.

"Yeah. He is. Anyway, over there is where the accountant work, where I work, and through that door is the break room," Ben walked over to the door, opening it to let Kaz through before following him.

"As you can see, this is where the bathrooms are. We all hang out over here," He said, flashing a toothy grin. Kaz gave a small, awkward smile back.

"Hm, not much of a people person?" Ben asked, adjusting his man-bun.

"Not... really," Kaz shook his head apologetically.

"Whatever, I know a park we can eat at together, if you want," The smaller of the two gave a crooked grin that reminded the taller one all too much of Snake.

"... You're very kind. I think I'd like that," Kaz smiled shyly. It briefly crossed his mind that Ben might be hitting on him a little, but he banished the thought quickly. Why would it even matter? He _should_ move on.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> brackets ([]) mean thoughts. Eli's are in italics. Keep in mind they're in Russian, but translated for both your convenience and ours.

To say that Eli and Tretij hated school was a severe understatement. And it wasn't the normal hatred that most kids had.

Tretij hated it with a burning passion, mostly because he couldn't speak to anyone and had to wear this stupid fucking surgical mask over his marred face because he couldn't wear his gas mask and nobody wanted to see that shit. But he hated it most of all because every second he had a splitting headache, overlapping minds of various overlapping voices and opinions, only one being shared throughout all of them.

_"Those three siblings are weird. Especially that redhead. Why do they need that mask? Are they a girl or a boy?"_

He wanted to throw everyone across the room.

The only solace he had been the gentle rub of Eli's mind. The soft, familiar hum of shared opinion and hatred. Even David's mind became nagging and annoying, the irritation at Eli's anger. It was utterly infuriating, especially when he had to be dragged away from his best, and only friend by those  _language teachers_  who seemed to purposely humiliate him in front of everyone. He wanted to scream.

That's where he was right then. In that  _special children room_  where they would teach him English.

He knew English perfectly well. Or at least, he could understand nearly every word. But he just couldn't say them. Something in his mind didn't want to bother putting together a full sentence in a language that wasn't his native one. The only word he bothered to say was "Eli".

But that teacher was trying to get him to say his name. It drove him crazy. The only one allowed to speak his real name aloud was his mother, and she was  _dead_. He wasn't about to tell them that his name was "third child", but he didn't want to get them even angrier than they were, despite their attempts at masking it.

"Come on. If you don't tell us today we'll just call your parents,"  _good luck with that._

He narrowed his eyes pathetically, shifting in the too-big seat once more. He was trying to find everything to fidget with, fiddling with the overly large sweatshirt that Mr. Kaz had bought him the other day. He had taken him clothes shopping and became increasingly more confused as to whether he was a boy or a girl.

He didn't care what kind of clothes he got, and Eli told Mr. Kaz that. So currently he was wearing this giant blue sweatshirt that had "PINK" written on it in big bold black letters. He thought it was kinda funny, because it said that the blue was pink.

"Come on, at least say your name," They coaxed again, pulling him out of his memory reel.

He huffed softly, glaring up at the ceiling. He could hear them groan in their head, begging for the hour-long period to be over soon so they could move onto a child who would actually try. But he didn't care. He wanted Eli here. Eli understood his anger.

He let out a long sigh, blinking a few times and listening to the mental note of the teacher, "She has long eyelashes". Oh perfect, they didn't even think twice about assuming he was a girl. At least Mr. Kaz and the other children wondered, instead of just slapping a label onto him.

He fiddled with the long blue sleeves when the teacher glanced at the clock, letting out a tiny sigh of relief.

"Alright, your parents should be expecting a call. Go back to class."

He did just that, scurrying from the small, trapping room and through the loud hallways, into the classroom that was equally loud but held inside his friend.

The blond immediately looked up upon feeling the redhead enter the room, a bright, crooked smile breaking across his face. Tretij couldn't help but smile at the small gap between his two front teeth. But upon looking around his friend the remainder of his nose wrinkled in disgust.

Surrounding Eli were a small group of around three or four girls, all of which were huddling close to him.

Tretij walked toward his friend, pushing the girls out of  _his_ spot before plopping down next to the blond, grabbing his arm protectively. Eli smiled and shuffled closer to Tretij until they were sitting knee-to-knee and then some, pressing up against the other comfortingly.

He glared at the girls, hearing their thoughts of, " _are they a couple? Why would a British guy go for someone like that?_ " and it drove him crazy. He glared up at the board in silence, draping his legs across his friend's lap.

Of course upon the teacher seeing this she yelled.

"You two! This isn't time for cuddling, alright!" He just glared, knowing Eli was matching the challenging gaze behind him.

"Treetig," She started.  _Fantastic, she can't even pronounce it right._

"It's pronounced  _Tretij_ " Eli said stubbornly, wrapping an arm around his friend.

"... Treetij," She still didn't pronounce it right, "Please, get off of Eli."

He just glared.

"Guys, you can just..." Dave whispered, hoping to spare his brother trouble. Eli shot his brother a glare to shut him up.

"Listen, if you two don't get off each other I'm calling your parents," Eli snorted behind him.

"Do it," He said boldly, his accent standing out next to all the Americans.

"Alright, both of you, office, now!" She snapped, pointing to the door. The two of them calmly stood up, Tretij still clinging to Eli's arm.  They walked silently through the school, not actually knowing where the office was. Of course that was fixed by a quick dip into someone's mind.

They walked into the office with far too much confidence, Eli reporting that they had been sent up.

Pretty soon they were making themselves comfortable in the overly cushy chair of the principal's office.

_[How're you feeling?]_

[Fine, I guess. I have a splitting headache, thanks to having around 200 people in my mind at once. A little irritated that there were about five girls in my spot, but fine.]

_[I'm sorry about that. They were fascinated by my accent, weirdly. But about the headache, maybe you should ask Kaz if he can ask the school to let you wear a hat around. Maybe that'll help.]_

[Not really, but it's better than nothing. Thanks, Eli.]

He pressed up against his friend the best he could while remaining in the seat. It was then that the principal came in, a rather bosomy woman with short curly hair that didn't compliment her face shape at all.

"Eli Miller and Treetsh Reebeenawk?" Eli cringed at the last name as Tretij cringed at the pronunciation.

"Tretij Rebenok," Eli corrected meekly, grabbing the sleeve of the redhead's sweatshirt.

"Whatever," She brushed it off, sitting across the desk from them intimidatingly, "So, you two were being  _"overly clingy and showing overt pda, along with disobeying a teacher"_?"

"Tretij was just getting some people away from me! He can't even speak English!" Eli protested, putting on his best innocent act. It wasn't very good.

"Well, this sheet says your guardian is Kazuria Miller? Do we need to call her?"

"First of all, he's a man. Second of all, it's Kazuhira. Third of all, no, you don't. We are close and act like this all the time. It helps calm us down," Eli decided pointedly to drop the act, still holding onto Tretij's sleeve.

"Don't you dare talk back to me! I guess we do have to call him!" She said pridefully, grabbing the phone on the table and typing in a number.

"He's at work," Eli informed coolly, rubbing Tretij's arm gently.

"Hello?" The familiar voice grumbled, obviously irritated.

"Mr. Miller?"

"Yes, hello. Who is this?"

"This is Mrs. Johansen, I'm the principal at your children's elementary school."

"Oh, fantastic. What did they do?"

"Well, first of all Treetig is refusing to speak, even in her native tongue during her English-learning class,"

"He's a boy!" Eli cut in.

"Second of all, Eli is disrespecting the adults in this building! He refuses to listen and will--"

"Give my opinion? I'm sorry about that, miss," Eli spoke bitterly.

"Eli, don't talk back to them, please," Kaz said impatiently, obviously irritated he got called so soon.

"Third of all, they show an excessive amount of pda and affection, especially for a pair of siblings," Her tone was accusatory, not only toward the kids but their guardian.

"Ma'am, I hope you're aware that they both have a large slough of mental disorders that we're still trying to work through. Both of them likely have excessive anxiety and being close to each other helps them calm down. Not to mention they are, in fact,  _not_  siblings and are simply being taken care of by the same person who is in no way genetically related to them. Therefore, even if they  _were_  in a romantic relationship, which is a ridiculous idea to entertain, considering they're both children, it would not be considered incest. If that's what you're implying," Kaz snapped, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to work. I apologize for them being difficult, but if you are not mindful of the different scenarios people come from then maybe you shouldn't work with kids."

_[Alright Kaz!]_ Eli seemed impressed, if not surprised at the sudden outburst.

[Wish he didn't mention our mental health, but yes, he did a good job.] He agreed, smiling gently under the blue surgical mask.

The principal, who neither of them bothered to remember the name of, huffed loudly.

"Fine. You two should go back to class," Something about her voice said that it wouldn't be the last of their troubles with her.


	4. Chapter 4

From there, they fell into a routine.

Kaz would wake up in the morning, around six am, use the bathroom, wake up the kids at around six fifteen, finish getting ready, wait for the kids to get ready, drive them to school, talk to Ruth, drive to work and at eleven have lunch at the park with Ben. It might be repetitive but he found it nice. He had made two close friends, or at least close considering he'd been living in the area only a month.

When the kids woke up Dave and Eli would fight over the bathroom while Tretij made them breakfast (he liked watching things burn/toast), and while David, who usually won the fight for the bathroom, ate breakfast Eli would use the bathroom and help Tretij look presentable. From there Tretij would get dressed, normally in some jacket or hoodie with leggings or skinny jeans, paired with his faithful black beanie that they had bought a week after school started. Then, once Eli and David finished breakfast they would get ready, and then they would grab their lunches and let Kaz drive them.

At school everything was methodical. Dealing with the girls "fascinated" by Eli's accent (Tretij said they were just hitting on him), dealing with the teachers that seemed to find a way to get them in trouble every time they did something mildly wrong. It was all a game.

They had let Eli come to the "English Learning" lessons with Tretij, to, "make her more comfortable". Eli, of course, corrected them faster than you can even say Eli. So now the class mostly consisted of Eli and Tretij shit-talking in their heads and Eli instructing him to say something so they could get out earlier without a call to Kaz.

Speaking of calls to Kaz, he got one at least once a week. They had even suspended Eli for a few days, at some point, and Tretij threw a fit so big he had to call him in sick. He really did try his best to parent them, but it was like trying to tame a wolf with a loose chain.

Earlier that day school had already broken what seemed like routine, announcing that they would have a few guests coming in. The guests were really just eighth graders, but that didn't stop the fascination. Especially when he saw the black cases they were holding.

They opened them quickly, pulling out sleek wooden objects that Tretij simply couldn't identify. Of course the intrusive minds were thinking of things like  _viola, violin, cello, bass._ He could assume.

"Alright everyone, my name is Cassia, and we're the orchestra. This, what I'm holding, is a Violin. It's the most common orchestral instrument, along with the highest and the smallest." She introduced, her long blond locks matching her somewhat ginger violin surprisingly well. He absent-mindedly wondered what he would look like playing one.

"My name is Leo, and this is a Viola. It's a little bigger than the violin, therefore lower, and it has the same strings as a cello," He didn't seem quite as confident as Cassia, but still had a small smile on his face.

Tretij liked the idea of a viola a lot.

"My name is Parker, and this is the cello. As Leo mentioned it has the same strings as a viola, but it's also the second biggest instrument along with the only only you play sitting down," He had a streak of blue in his blonde hair. He didn't like him much.

"And my name is Norah, and this is the Bass. It's the biggest instrument we offer, and thus the deepest. It takes a lot of patience to play but they play an extremely important role," She spoke with smooth words and a bright smile. Her hair was a tad bit mousy but she had obviously tried to tame it for the presentation.

The bass seemed to pique Eli's interest.

_[I wonder how much that thing weighs.]_

[Probably a lot. I mean, look at the size of it.]

_[Think I could carry it?]_

[Probably. I mean, you're pretty strong and plus that thing is hollow.]

"The first song we'll play is as a group, and then we'll play short melodies with each instrument," Cassia spoke up again, swiping the blonde locks away from her shoulders before setting the butt of the violin against it. Tretij couldn't help but take notice of the strange way they had to hold everything.

The song was beautiful. And the best part was that everyone was focused on the song. The headache that seemed to split open his skull had calmed to a mere whimper. Even Eli's normally loud mind had relaxed.

The music seemed to swoop between low and high notes, and although one of the higher notes hurt his ears a tiny bit he was enamored.

The song ended with a final big note, their bows wavering in the air for a second before falling to their sides.

"We'll start with the violins. Violins, as most string instruments, have four strings. It can play to to an E without using your fingers," Cassia plays the smallest string, and Tretij identified it as one of the ones hurting his ears.

"The strings go G, D, A, E," She played them in order.

The violins, the one with the most people, Tretij noticed, started playing. It was beautiful, but once again hurt his ears when they went too high.

"The violas go up to A, but they have the added bonus of a C string," Leo jumped in, playing the largest string, "The strings go C, G, D, A."

He loved the viola. It was simply beautiful. It never went to high and dipped down into what felt like the very fiber of his being.

He loved it. And he wanted to play it.

* * *

Bringing home sheets other than homework was also out of routine, but neither Eli nor Tretij seemed to care. They waited around the living room for Kaz to come home an hour later like an upset girlfriend, gripping the forums tightly in their small hands.

Eli wanted to play bass. He said it was "the manliest". Tretij wanted to play the viola. It was just so... _pretty._

As soon as Kaz walked through the door the kids were in front of him, shoving the papers in his face.

"M-Mr Ka-az," Tretij's voice was shaky, his English broken, "j-join o...ork...orketra!"

Kaz, although he looked tired, smiled brightly, patting Tretij's head. His English was getting a lot better, although he still couldn't pronounce a lot of long words.

"The orchestra, huh? Did you know I was in the orchestra, when I was little?" He asked, carefully lifting the smaller or the two kids and carrying him to the couch, letting the children climb up next to him as he looked over the forums.

"No," Eli breathed, hugging Tretij tightly.

"It's true. I played the violin, and I was pretty damn good at it," He smirked, grabbing a pen.

"The violin is too high," The redhead said softly, leaning against his blond friend.

"Yeah, sometimes," He tilted his head, quickly signing both of the sheets and filling out the little questions, pausing for a second before filling in the bubble that said the school would need to supply the instruments.

"You guys will work hard, right?" He asked, turning his clear gaze to the kids, who started nodding vigorously. He smiled slightly, shaking his head to himself. Those two are just crazy. 


	5. Chapter 5

Kaz knew how to cook some damn good food. And sure, he hadn't really gotten to show off yet, since he learned David and Tretij were both pretty picky eaters (Eli would eat just about anything you gave him). But he was determined to make a good meal for these kids.

So that's what he was doing. He had been in the kitchen for the last fifteen minutes, deciding to make the kids some burgers.

The first kid that appeared was David. It wasn't much of a surprise, he went and found Kaz often to either distract himself or just pure boredom. When Kaz asked if he wanted to help he was pretty hesitant but still let Kaz pick him up onto a stool. He was a bit shorter than Eli, after all.

"Right now I'm just mixing together the ingredients for the buns. Do you think you can grab the mixer for me?" He asked, pointing to a low cupboard.

David immediately got down on his knees in front of it, opening it a little too fast and startling himself. Once he got it open he grabbed the mixer Kaz was talking about, carrying it over to the counter with very little difficulty. As Kaz plugged it in he went back and shut the cupboard.

By the time they had started kneading the dough Tretij and Eli came home. They were at orchestra before, both extremely excited about it. They had insisted on walking home, thought. Why Kaz did not know.

"Wh-What are yo... you do'ng?" Tretij's English was getting better. It was still pretty strained, but at least he could say a full sentence with little stuttering.

"We're making dinner," David answered excitedly, flashing a small smile at him.

"Do you wanna help?" Kaz offered, idly hoping that the dough wouldn't do anything to his prosthetic.

"U-Um... Yeah, s-sure... Eli!" That he could say perfectly.

"What?" Eli called back, over near his and Tretij's bedroom, since he was putting away his friend's viola for him.

See it was originally the twins who shared a room, but one too many incidents meant Kaz had to do some shuffling.

"We're g-gonna help ma... Make di... nner!" the sentence was a little more broken up, but passable.

"Do I have to?" Eli groaned, walking out of the hall with his head tilted back and hands dangling down dramatically.

"Eli, Tretij wants to help and wants you to as well," Kaz put on his 'patient' voice.

"M... But..."

"Please, Eli?" That was said with no stutters or pauses, mostly because the redhead had to say it a lot.

"Mmm... fine!" One flash from Tretij's eyes and Eli gave in, not wanting to see the other boy disappointed.

"Thank you, Eli." Kaz said, helping the blonde up onto a chair so he could see, while his friend just floating around him.

"What you... you do?" Tretij mostly gave up on constructing full, proper sentences at this point.

"I'm kneading the dough right now, and then we'll make some buns in the oven," At the mention of using the oven Tretij brightened up.

Before anyone could get another word out Eli suddenly shot out of the room.

"What?" David asked, seeming a little hurt that they were finally bonding as a family and Eli ran away.

"M-Mask..." Tretij tried to explain.

"He's gonna grab your gas mask for you?" Kaz guessed, earning a swift nod from the younger of the kids.

Sure enough Eli came back within ten minutes, holding the gas mask with care. He stood up on the chair again, blocking everyone else's view with his head while he helped Tretij change from the surgical mask into the clunky gas mask.

Kaz knew at this point it was useless to get those two to say please or thank-you or really anything that revolved around manners, especially to each other. Every time he did they responded quite stubbornly with "it doesn't matter!" They claimed that they could feel that the other was thankful or sorry. Kaz didn't believe them too much, but he didn't believe in psychic either. But here he was, with one under his care.

"Alright, Tretij, do you wanna put these in?" Kaz asked, shaping them. He earned a happy nod.

By the time they were finished David had already cut his finger, and Tretij had burnt his hand. The only one that went uninjured (even thought Tretij didn't seem to mind the burn) was Eli. Surprising, since he was the most reluctant.

He decided to let them eat in the living room. Over paper towels and paper plates, of course.

He turned on the first movie he could find in English, a shitty romance that was subject to more than enough teasing from Tretij and Eli. It was kinda cute, they both promised each other they couldn't be cheesy like that. It was like they planned on marrying each other.

Kaz really hit a point where he shipped the kids, huh?


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tretij: *holding Eli* Yes hello this is my emotional support brat.

Conferences were fucking wild, to say the least. They all had the same teacher, so that meant Kaz took up three thirty minute periods.

The teacher had nothing but praise for Dave, of course.

"Oh, he helps keep his brothers in line." (Kaz had to correct her on that, since Tretij definitely wasn't their brother.)

"Oh, he's always so quiet, he never talks when he's not supposed to."

Really the only thing they were concerned about with him was the lack of socialization with his peers. Of course Kaz knew why that happened, it was because Dave believed that getting close to people only lead to him getting hurt.

Then next was Tretij's conference. That was a fucking disaster. The English Learning teachers came in to say that he was behind, the teacher told him he was too touchy. Apparently at some point Tretij just started crying with no explanation and never bothered to tell Kaz about it. They even threatened to separate him and Eli into different classes.

Eventually they came to a compromise. Kaz would send both Tretij and Eli to therapy. He was certain neither of them would be happy, but it had to be done.

Needless to say Eli's conference went worse.

"So... Eli, is... Very stubborn," The teacher started awkwardly, earning a soft scoff from the blond next to Kaz, "Does he need to sit like that?"

Of course Eli would sit in every fucking chair like it's a goddamn throne. Of _course._

"No, no he doesn't. Eli, please put your legs together, for god's sake," Kaz scolded, earning a sharp glare and minimal shuffling. Eli's legs were now closer together, instead of manspreading like he was about to get head.

"Alright, well, I feel that Eli would benefit off of tutoring of some kind. He gets consistently low scores, especially in reading and spelling. It's like he can't even see the page," The teacher, who Kaz now realized was named Mrs. W, continued, obviously more comfortable.

"I can't!" Eli protested, moving his hands from behind his head into his lap.

"Really? You can't see the board or the page?" Kaz asked, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"I'm serious I can't! It's always all blurry! Are people normally able to see it?" Eli asked, not a drip of sarcasm or any hint that he would be lying.

That was when Kaz distantly remembered EVA making an offhand comment that one of the twins might need glasses.

_Holy shit._

"Ah, well, I'll take you to get your eyes checked soon, then," He said, trying not to laugh at the fact that of both the twins, Eli was the one that needed glasses. Why that was so amusing, he didn't know.

"Well, we also talks back to both his peers and his teachers," Mrs. W informed, shooting a glance at Eli when he opened his mouth.

"I'm aware. To my knowledge this is mostly thanks to his own experiences. He has reason, I swear," Kaz promised, feeling the urge to defend Eli more.

* * *

The next day he drove Eli to the clinic, Tretij there to try and get his friend to stop pouting over needing glasses. Of course, when the redhead heard the first thing he did was laugh. Kaz was just glad that he wasn't the only one that found it funny.

Upon arriving he had to fill out paperwork, which took around thirty minutes, and then accompanied Eli (Tretij had to stay back in fear they would accidentally rig the test, thinking about the letter that he could see clearly) to around three rooms, and in each one the doctor seemed to get more confused and concerned.

"Alright, well, his vision is terrible. One of the worst I've ever seen in someone that never went to a clinic before," At least they were blunt.

"He needs glasses?" Kaz assumed, earning a nod.

"I'm sure if I tell them his prescription they'll try to get it done faster. It's a miracle he didn't get hit with a car or something," They said, shaking their head a tiny bit.

By this time Tretij had joined them again, and was letting out little giggles the more the doctor spoke.

Another doctor came over to help them try on glasses, and they ended up picking a pair with thin frames that were a light brown, Eli insisting on finding glasses that were the least noticeable.

They were still noticeable. Very, very noticeable.

It seemed to accentuate his already long eyelashes, and while they were still no match for Tretij's omega lashes, it did make him look more feminine. It even seemed to round off his nose a little more. It added balance.

And it was fucking hilarious.

Every time Eli even tried to look angry he just looked like he was about to cry, the edge taken off nearly completely by the frames that were actually made for girls.

They got the framing done by the time he had to go back to school after the break. The first thing David did upon seeing his brother was, of course, laugh.

"Y-You look like a girl!" He said, laughing happily.

"Shut up!" Eli snapped, folding his arm. He had on the angry face, but that only made it worse.

"He's right Eli," Tretij said softly, "Now we match. We both look like girls."

That didn't make it much better.

When Eli went to school the teacher had to ask who he was. The girls that normally did their flirting were gone. It was partly a relief, but partly infuriating for Eli. Some of the boys even took to calling him "Ellie", since he looked to feminine.

That's why Eli was in the office again. He had punched one of them and knocked out a tooth. Needless to say Kaz wasn't happy to be called, but the guy by his desk, who introduced himself as Ben, thought the whole thing was hilarious. He did a pretty good job hiding it, but Eli could hear it in his voice.

He didn't like Ben very much. And not only because he thought the kids were being funny for calling him Ellie. It was because he was acting like Eli's dad.

That might seem a little odd to hate, since Kaz had even forged documents that made him Eli's legal guardian, and gave Eli his last name, but Ben was off, somehow. He acted like he was Kaz's husband and him and Eli had known each other since Eli's birth. Which was  _not_ the case. No one but Dave, Dr. Clark, and Zero had known him since birth, not even his real dad.

Needless to say he got pretty damn huffy. Tretij had to essentially drag him home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: I actually drew Eli with glasses (in The Night Before Metal Gear they say "Liquid took off his glasses") and I tried to make him look angry. He looked like a woman about to cry.


	7. Chapter 7

Kaz's first thought when he heard a knock on the door was that it was Ruth or Ben. That was cut down, though. He hadn't given either of them his home address. His second, wishful thought was that it was one of Eli or Dave's friends. He knew that was wrong, neither of them had made any new friends or anything, even after the therapy he made all his kids go to.

So he approached the door with an extreme amount of caution, telling Eli to hide Tretij and Dave in the master bedroom, under the bed. He even considered grabbing a gun, but that would be a little overkill for something like a salesman, right?

When he opened the door his first instinct was to tilt his head down a little. He was taller than the average man, of course. But this was no average man. As he trailed his eyes upward he knew more and more who had really come over.

"V. Good to see you," He lied, gripping the door frame tightly.

"Kaz," _God_ , Kaz missed his smile, he stopped doing it so much when he became _Big Boss_ , "I ah... Well, can I come in?"

"...Fine," He carefully moved out of the way, watching him step into the dimly lit apartment.

"So, I trust you already know?" V asked, carefully making himself home on the couch.

"About what?" He responded, knowing full well what he meant.

"Don't play dumb," V cracked another, sadder smile, "I know Ocelot told you."

"...Yeah, he did."

"When?"

"The day before I left. I swear I would've told you sooner if I knew."

"That's not what I'm worried about. I know that even if you had told me, John would'a put you through hell," He looked up grimly with a sigh, motioning for Kaz to sit next to him.

"Do you... remember?" Kaz asked, seating himself next to the larger man, "From back when..."

"Not much, only bits a pieces. Sometimes I'll get something new but never anything concrete. I know who I used to be, at least," V confessed, taking a deep breath before suddenly pulling Kaz closer to him.

"I do remember that a certain commander had a giant crush on me though. Even faked illness just to see me," He said, humor lacing his every word.

"Th-That was nearly ten years ago..." Kaz protested weakly, but still let V hug him close to his body.

"Hm... Where are all the kids? Eli and... Dave, right?"

"Yeah. I uh, assumed the worst and had them hide under my bed," Kaz said, pulling away from the embrace, "Wanna see them? You can be properly introduced to David, and meet Tretij."

"Who the hell is Tretij?" He butchered the pronunciation, but Kaz chose to not comment on that.

"Tretij is Eli's friend. They were scheming together but I decided to leave with Eli before they put it into action. Tretij decided to come with," Kaz explained, getting up his feet to find the kids.

"Eli has friends?" V joked with a smile.

"Haha, very funny," Kaz responded dryly, smirking slightly before heading off to the master bedroom.

Sure enough under the bed laid David, Eli, and Tretij. Of course Eli was holding Tretij like he was a teddy bear, but that was beside the point.

"It's fine," he said softly, crouching down next to them.

"Are you sure?" Eli asked, his voice muffled by the fact that he was hiding his face in Tretij's hair.

"Yes, I'm sure. It's just V," Kaz assured once more, running his metal hand through his hair.

When the kids finally crawled out from under the bed (Tretij just floated through it) Kaz carefully picked up Eli, knowing for a fact that he would throw a fit as soon as he saw who he thought was his dad.

He carried Eli out into the living room, and sure enough he immediately shot the sharpest glared Kaz had ever seen at V.

"Oh. _That's_ Tretij," V said, before smiling at him. Kaz held onto the fact that he had deeper dimples when John didn't.

"You know each other?" He asked, tightening his grip on Eli.

"Oh yeah, he burned down the hospital."

"That was _him_? Holy shit."

"And you got Eli to wear a shirt?"

"Begrudgingly," The two went back and forth, Kaz smiling a tiny bit to himself.

"M... Mr. K-Kaz is h... appy..." Tretij pointed out, fiddling with their sweatshirt that looked more like a dress.

"Yeah, he's got the hots for a phony," Eli spat, folding his arms like the child he was.

"Eli," Kaz's voice was filled with warning, "First of all, don't speak about him like that. He's his own person. Second of all, no, I don't have a crush on V. If we want to go into who has a crush on who, I could very well make a case that you and Tretij are into each other."

"We do not--!"

"Eli, be quiet!" Dave snapped, before suddenly walking over briskly to behind V, "There's a dog and you're scaring them."

"Oh, yeah, that's DD."

"You brought DD?"

"That's not a problem, is it?"

"No. I probably should've expected it," Kaz watched carefully as Dave squatted down near the wolf-dog, holding out his hand for him to sniff, "You like dogs, Dave?"

"Uh-huh," Dave murmured, scooting forward to pet DD.

"His name is DD, he's a wolf dog," V said proudly, moving to squat down next to Dave.

"He's fluffy..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kaz is going around lifting 6th graders off the ground like they're kindergartners. And then introducing them to their other new dad. He's fucking wild.


	8. Chapter 8

Dave liked dogs. A lot. He always wanted one of his own, but going from foster home to foster home proved that impossible. He got more attached to the dogs they had than the actual families.

But now there was a dog. At his _permanent_ home.

He liked this "V" person. Mostly because of DD. V seemed to share his enthusiasm for the mammals, Even showing Dave how to command them. He even asked Kaz if he could get Dave one of his own. Kaz said no, of course, one dog was enough, and plus Dave would be at school.

That was met with a lot of whining, but Eli cut in and said that if they were going to get a pet, they would get a cat for him and Tretij. That was met with a "maybe" that very obviously meant no.

But Dave could live with just one. Plus, DD was a wolf dog. That was even cooler.

Dave was sick, at the moment. Not super sick, in fact he could probably go to school just fine, but he... exaggerated a bit. Kaz called him out, but V backed him up.

Dave _really_ liked this "V" person.

Right now they were both on a walk, with DD of course, strategically avoiding Kaz's work place. That really wasn't too hard, but Dave seemed so interested in the idea of being sneaky that V didn't have the heart to tell him that really Kaz worked quite a few miles away and they would have to try and pass it to even come near it.

"Hey, Dave? Whaddya think a' Eli? 'S he causin' ya any trouble?" V asked, tugging on DD's leash a little to make sure he didn't run off.

"Mm... his accent is either fake or very exaggerated," He said, swinging his arms by his side. That earned a small, hearty chuckle.

"Any trouble?"

"I mean, when we shared a room he would wake me up by throwing water balloons at me. And his relationship with Tretij kinda confuses me. I mean, I heard of people being with each other for the rest of their lives, but those are all adults," Dave rambled a little, looking up at the sky to make sure they could make it home before school ended.

"Yep, that's Eli, alright. Did I ever tell ya about the time one a' my... friends, found him picking flowers for Tretij?"

"What? No!"

"'S true. We had this thing called the "animal conservation platform," and ya' could only get there by chopper. How he got there, I dunno. Anyway, it had animals in these little habitats, so 'ey would be comfy. He managed to get into the sheep habitat, and was pickin' all the flowers!"

"Really? Do you think he hijacked the chopper?"

"Maybe. Seems like somethin' he'd do. Anyway, he got caught, obviously. Buffalo saw him in there and asked what the hell he was doin'. He just glared at 'er. She asked if he was getting 'em for a lady friend, as a joke, but he got all red and huffy. Couple days later Kaz is tellin' me he saw 'im givin' flowers to a weird redhead," V smiled, his eye crinkling.

"Did he think Tretij was a girl?" Dave asked, grabbing V's hand.

"Nah, course not. Buffalo was implyin' they were an item," He informed, swinging Dave's arm playfully.

"An item?"

"Where people are thinking about spendin' the rest a' their lives together."

"Oh... Hey, dad--" Dave cut himself off before he could continue, horrifically embarrassed all the sudden.

"Yeah?" V asked, barely flinching.

"You're... okay with me calling you that?" Dave asked, his ears burning.

"Yeah, sure, why not? Technically I'm supposed to be exactly like your biological dad in every way, so why not?" V smiled again.

"Oh... okay, well, dad, when should we get back?"

"Ah, probably around... now."

Without hesitation V picked him up, threw him over his shoulder and started running, DD sprinting after them. Surprisingly no one asked. Well, they did get some strange looks, but for the most part were brushed off since Dave was giggling loudly.

By the time they got back into the apartment they still had a few minutes left until Eli and Tretij came home. Although, Dave was pretty sure Tretij noticed him passing through his field. He said nothing, though.

"Alright, kid. Off to bed. Don' wan' Kaz to get suspicious," V ruffled his long hair.

Dave followed his orders, slipping out of the room and into his bedroom, curling up into a ball under the sheets and trying to look like he had just barely woken up.

He finally got into position when the door opened.

"V! Where's Dave? Is he asleep still?" Kaz questioned, 

"Yep. I actually think he jus' woke up. Might wanna check on 'im," V responded.

"Why would he need to? He's faking it!" Eli insisted, and Dave could almost  _see_ him flip his hair obnoxiously.

"Quiet, Eli."

"What?" Eli suddenly got defensive.

"What, ya' think she's here? Nah, would'a told ya guys by now. Pretty sure she knows where I wen', though," Dave could also almost see his wink that looked more like a blink.

"W... Whatever..." Eli mumbled grumpily, before Dave's door was opened. In the door way stood Kaz, although Dave idly wondered if he would like being called "dad" too. Maybe something different, since V was already dad...

"How're you feeling?" Kaz asked gently, replacing the empty cup on Dave's bedside table with a full one.

"Mmm... fine..." Dave mumbled, trying to seem sleepy.

"Well enough to go to school tomorrow?" Kaz asked, placing a hand on Dave's forehead.

"I... Don't know..." Dave said slowly, hoping to spend another day with his dad.

Then DD came bounding into the room, jumping up onto the bed and making himself home. As per usual, he was followed by V.

"Let the kid stay home anoth'r day, Kaz. He needs it," He spoke smoothly, walking over to stand beside the blond.

"Are you sure? He missed some homework today, and Eli was being all bitchy about having to bring it for him..." Kaz said uncertainly.

"D-Dad's right, I... should probably stay home..." Dave said, shuffling.

"Dad?" Kaz repeated.

"Tha's me," V responded, somewhat proud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IS IT WEIRD TO FANGIRL OVER YOUR OWN WRITING?


	9. Chapter 9

Kaz had friends now, that was the nice part. He got to complain to them about how his "roommate" was conspiring against him. Of course, Ben thought he was joking and Ruth just shrugged.

He only ever said those things because he jealous, of course. Even Eli had taken to calling V "father" after a bit, but Kaz was still just Kaz. Unless you're Tretij, where he is then Mr. Kaz, and if Tretij particularly delirious he'll get a mom or two.

But, since neither of his friends believed him, he's have to show them. So he invited them over for dinner. That was a thing people did normally, right?

When Ben arrived (he was the first one) he looked somewhat surprised to see V there.

"Yo, this is who you were talkin' about? This guy's huge..." Ben said nervously, shifting around.

"He won't hurt you. He uh..." He panicked for a second, looking at V to see if what he was gonna say was fine. Of course he just smiled, "He used to be a medic," Kaz finished, heart hammering at his chest.

"Medic!? That guy could rip someone in half, like hell he was there giving stitches!" Ben exclaimed, raising his eyebrows.

"Nope, I was a medic," V cut in, before turning his attention to Eli. who was asking him for something to do.

"Aw, shit, is that Eli?" Ben asked, squatting down to meet Eli's eyes. He really didn't have to squat too far, Eli was only half a head shorter than him.

"None of your business," Eli snapped back, before climbing up onto the couch, closer to V.

"Where's your little friend?" He asked, still squatting down.

"Don't fucking patronize me," Eli spat, grabbing V's arm.

"Eli, please be nice," V said calmly.

"Father, I'm not six! I'm nearly his height and I'm not even fully grown! He can shut his bloody mouth!" Eli snapped, glaring pointedly at Ben.

"Hey, kid, want something to eat? I brought some sweets," Ben said, obviously trying to get on Eli's good side. Which was not an easy thing to do.

"Leave me alone!"

"Your accent is more obvious in person."

"I said _leave me alone!"_ At this point Eli was half-yelling, and Kaz had to step in.

"Eli, don't shout at him. He's just trying to be nice. Why don't you go play with Tretij?" He said, earning a glance from Ben that seemed half-surprised.

When Eli ran off to his room Ben turned to him.

"What the hell was that?"

"What?"

"If he was an adult you would've bit his head off!"

"Well, yeah, they're kids."

"But you're so much more gentle! I almost expected you to hit him upside the head and call him a dumb ass!"

Kaz just shrugged, walking to the kitchen to start on dinner. Of course as soon as he did there was another knock.

"I'll get it," V said, rising up off the couch and effectively towering over Ben (who looked extremely intimidated).

It was nothing compared to V and Ruth.

Ruth stood at a measly 5"2, just around a head shorter than Kaz. V was 6"5. He was over a foot taller than her.

"Kaz! It's so good to see you!" Ruth threw her arms around Kaz as soon as she came near him, "Where are the kids?"

As if summoned Dave appeared.

"Dad, DD is looking out the window and won't stop," He said worriedly, looking up at V.

"He probably just saw a squirrel or somethin'. Say hi to your papa's guests, Dave."

Kaz nearly puked in surprise. V was... having the kids call him papa?

"Kaz, I didn't know you had a _husband,_ " Ruth said, sounding mildly impressed.

"Ah-- no! That's not my husband!" Kaz scrambled, trying to not seem as flustered as he was.

"We're just friends. I adopted the kids and Kaz offered to supply us with a home," V cut in, walking to the doorway of the kitchen, blinking. Or it was a wink. No one was a hundred percent sure. Except Ruth.

She was  _certain_ that V was trying to win Kaz's affection. She also knew that Ben was doing the same.

Well, Ben can go fuck himself. Kaz and this other guy seemed much better together, anyway.

"Hello, Miss Ruth," Dave said, appearing near her all the sudden. He was only around three inches shorter.

"Hello there, David," Ruth said kindly, "I believe you've met my daughter, Vehanna?"

She grabbed the shoulders of the little girl ghosting her this whole time.

"Yes, ma'am," Dave said kindly, smiling at the girl.

"Your brother is annoying," She said pointedly, swiping her long brown hair away from her face.

"Vehanna!"

"She's right," Dave cut in before Ruth could scold her.

"I CAN HEAR YOU, BROTHER," a more... British, voice called from somewhere in the apartment. Vehanna flushed.

"I KNOW, ELI!" Dave hollered back, earning a loud scoff.

"Both of you be nice," Kaz scolded, being sure to be loud enough for Eli to hear without yelling like the other two.

"Papa, what's for dinner?" Dave asked, Kaz coughing a little. He really hadn't been called that before...

"Ah-- I'm making casserole," Kaz answered, trying not to seem like he was screaming inside. Which, well, he was.

"I'll make a salad," Ruth cut in, "If that's okay, of course."

"Sure, why not? V, can toy make sure she knows where everything is?" Kaz asked, grabbing a couple packs of noodles.

Dave ended up being the one to help. He needed something to do, and before long Kaz was shouting down the hallway for Tretij and Eli to come and eat.

There were a few loud thuds, and some softer ones, before the two that seemed to be attached at the hip appeared.


	10. Chapter 10

By the time eight o'clock rolled by Ruth and Vehanna had left. Ben was getting ready to leave, and Eli was trying very stubbornly to get Tretij to eat, sitting in the corner of the kitchen where no one could see them.

By the time Ben left Dave was cleaning off the remains of food on all the dishes, Tretij loading the (cheap) dish washer with his psychic power.

And there was a knock on the door. Normally Kaz wouldn't be so alert, the month or so V had been with them there had been a soldier or two that quit the Diamond Dogs, there to say hello to their boss one last time. But there was some indescribable quality to the knock, a quirk Kaz knew he heard before but couldn't place.

He was just about ready to throw hands as soon as he opened the door. And he nearly did.

Standing there in front of him was Revolver Motherfucking Ocelot, man titties tucked away in the same shirt he had before.

"Motherfucker," Kaz breathed, knowing the kids in his house couldn't hear.

"Hey, watch it. There's kids," Ocelot scolded, and before Kaz could retort he noticed that there was, in fact, a kid that could hear them.

Standing next to Ocelot, nearly hiding behind him, was what appeared to essentially be a younger Huey. That threw Kaz's guard up higher.

"Who is that?" Kaz asked, holding back the urge to break Ocelot's over-sized nose.

"This is my step-brother. His name is Hal," Ocelot informed, carefully moving the child so he was standing in front of him.

"Step brother? You told us you had no living family. Plus, you also said your parents were only ever married to each other," Kaz didn't believe him for a second. He was just spouting useless bullshit to earn pity.

"Ah, well, my parents didn't marry anyone else, that's true. However, I did have a step-mom, who took me in claiming she knew my mom. I was only fifteen so I trusted her. I trust you remember Dr. Strangelove?" He responded calmly, still holding his "brother"'s shoulders.

"You're telling me Dr. Strangelove knew your mother and took you in?" Kaz repeated, even less convinced.

"Yes. I am. She's my step-mom, and at the time I told you I had no living family I wasn't aware Hal here existed," He nudged the brown-haired boy forward.

"And you want me to?"

"We don't exactly have a home. We need a place to stay," Ocelot thumbed at the edge of his glove.

"You're homeless with a four year old," Kaz repeated in disbelief.

"Five," Hal corrected softly, holding up his open palm for emphasis.

"Yes, we are homeless. We have been for a couple weeks now. It took some asking around to find you two. Or rather, five now, right?" Ocelot glanced back into the apartment where Dave was now sitting on the couch with his book.

"Yes, there's five of us. We only have three rooms. Where do you want to sleep? V is already taking up the couch. And even then I don't trust you not to pull some kind of shit while I'm asleep," Kaz answered irritably.

Before Ocelot could come up with some bullshit excuse V was behind Kaz, pressing his back up against the blond. Even Eli appeared at Kaz's feet.

"Ah, Ocelot! It's good to see you! Come on in," V wrapped an arm around Kaz to move him away from the door, Eli shuffling a little to make room. He didn't look too happy, though.

"V!" Kaz hissed, looking up at him irritably.

"Calm down, Kaz. If he tries anything then I'm far, far bigger than him," V answered, pressing his forehead against the blond hair in front of him.

"But will you actually do anything?" Kaz asked, holding his hands up against the hairy arm still wrapped around his waist.

"Father! Papa! There's a _traitor_ here, this is _no_ time for being lovey-dovey!" Eli snapped, pointing at Ocelot childishly.

"Eli, be nice," V scolded gently, moving away from Kaz.

"Well? It seems like the couch would be open," Ocelot said smoothly, smirking at Kaz.

"What? I told you, V sleeps there-- oh, you little..." Kaz balled his fists.

"Mr. Ocelot, Dad sleeps on the couch. We have an air mattress big enough for your brother, but I don't think we have anything you or both of you could fit on," Dave spoke quietly, looking up from his book.

"That's fine. I really only need to know Hal is safe. Kaz, V, can you take care of him? He's awfully smart, and pretty useful," Ocelot said, pushing the child forward gently.

"Sure we can!" V cut in before Kaz could say anything, smiling at Ocelot.

"Father!" Eli sounded scolding, folding his arms up, "Where would we even put the mattress?"

"It can go in my room," David suggested, putting in his bookmark. He earned an exaggerated eye roll.

"Sure, fine, whatever. But don't bring it near my room," He said, glaring one last time before disappearing down the hall.

"Adam, where are you going?" Hal asked softly, grabbing onto Ocelot's glove.

"Don't worry, Hal. I'm gonna stay somewhere else, but I'll visit everyday, I swear," Ocelot said gently, rubbing Hal's head.

"Promise?" The brunette asked, still gripping one hand.

"Yes, I promise, Hal."


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This gets really really gooey sweet so be warned.

Hal had certainly made himself home. Or rather, he made himself home in Dave's room. He really didn't leave unless he had to. Or Ocelot was there, of course.

He ended up testing into second grade, despite being kindergarten age. He never disrupted class, and kept to himself most of the time. Just like at home. But, he had one friend.

Dave. He made friends with Dave.

Dave had been the one to chase away any kids meaning to pick on him, Dave had been the one to lead Hal home when Kaz had to work late. It was almost like Eli and Tretij, minus the psychic link and any psychic anything, really.

Kaz had little to no luck, however. While Hal seemed quite friendly, and not at all deterred by his brother's hostility toward Kaz, he never spoke much.

Kaz sighed, grabbing the first random cartoon he could find. The Pokemon Anime, subbed. Good enough. Eli had been bothering him all day about something to do.

"Alright, Pokemon time," He said with a tired smile.

When the theme song started it was like Hal was summoned. He appeared out of no where, standing quietly next to the couch with some kind of innocent curiosity. It made Kaz smile a little more genuinely.

"Wanna watch, Hal?" He asked, carefully picking up the child and setting him down next to Dave. Of course, as soon as that happen Eli scooted away until he was laying dramatically over Tretij's lap.

"Yes please, Mr. Kaz," Hal said softly, shifting until he was sitting comfortably.

"Papa, we should start from episode one, so Hal knows what's happening!" Dave suggested, letting Hal fall against his arm and cling to it.

"Noooo! Then we have to watch all of it over again!" Eli whined, sitting up so his butt was in Tretij's lap instead of his back.

"We could catch things we didn't notice before!" Dave argued, glaring.

"Mph..." Eli made a face, "Fine..." He mumbled.

"Alright, first episode it is," Kaz said, going back.

The kids all looked at the TV intently, completely engaged.

Kaz smiled, watching the kids for a bit before walking away, into his bedroom. He had a bed just about big enough for two people, and he idly wondered if V would fit in with him.

He shook his head, taking a deep breath. V wasn't Medic anymore. He may remember, but it's still not the man Kaz faked injuries to go see.

"Hey, lookin' for somethin' to do?" The man who he was just thinking about asked. Upon turning around Kaz saw him standing dutifully in the doorway, with a tiny smile on his face.

That smile... that was the expression that could never, ever belong to Big Boss. That was Medic- No, Vicente. It could only ever be him.

"...Yeah," He was half tempted to respond with what he would've said before.  _Well, I found him._ That always got a smile and short laugh. But, of course, he never took it as real flirting.

"Mm... Well, you could always come on a walk with me," V offered, trying his best to look relaxed. Unfortunately, Big Boss wasn't as lean as Medic (Not like Medic was spindly, he could probably lift Kaz with one arm) and any attempt at a casual position somehow looked threatening. Plus, V was a good few inches taller than him, and the horn definitely didn't help..

"Eh, my bionic gets fussy when I move too much," Kaz declined, seating himself on the bed.

"Well, then, maybe you could help me with something?" V asked, seating himself beside the blond.

"What?"

"I remember very, very distinctly a blond guy, very gentle, very kind, who would hit on... Uh, me, I guess."

"And?"

"And what?"

"Did you like him back?"

"What are we, middle school girls?"

"Might as well be."

"Heh, well, yeah. I remember every time M-- sorry, _I_ would see him, I would get really happy, and flustered."

"What'd his uniform look like?"

"Green, and yellow. That's all I remember. Oh yeah, and I couldn't remember his eye color, I think 'e wore something over 'em," V said, his blue eyes misting over. Damn, those eyes are another thing that could only belong to Vicente.

"V, that was... that was me," Kaz confessed, smiling a little.

"That was you!?" He asked, smiling brightly, obviously surprised yet amused.

"Heh,  yeah, it was." Kaz smiled back, leaning against V.

"Well, do ya prefer this me or who I was before?" V asked, wrapping an arm around Kaz. He could feel the muscles, and goddamn, he had to admit that Big Boss, while an asshole, was hot as fuck.

"Mmm... I can't really answer that. Vicente was, and still is, hot. But, unfortunately, Big Boss was blessed not only with stupidity but with fantastic looks," He said smoothly, glancing up at V.

"Oh, really?" V asked, rubbing his thumb over Kaz's waist.

"It's true. And plus, there are things about you that couldn't possibly belong to him," He tried to ignore how close they were.

"Really? What's that?" V moved to cup the Blond'es cheek, making them face each other.

"Your eyes. You have these really pretty, bright blue eyes. His are more grey," Kaz shared, staring. V smiled.

"And your smile. Big Boss never smiled. But you... you smile all the time," They were getting closer now, and their foreheads were touching. Despite the brunette being careful not to stab him Kaz could still feel where his skin turned to shrapnel.

"Do you like it?" V asked, and goddammit Kaz could feel his breath on his lips.

"Yes, I do," He said, letting V carefully take off his glasses.

"I like it when you smile, too. You should do it more often," The taller of the two muttered, finally pulling Kaz close enough to kiss him.

And holy _fuck_ it was fantastic.

V's lips were somewhat chapped but not quite there, having this vaguely rough texture. He smelled like... well, exactly what you would think he would smell like. Like sweat, shampoo, dog and dirt. It was fucking disgusting yet at the same time so perfectly him that Kaz could've sworn that he smelled anesthetic as well.

"Do you trust our kids enough to go out to eat?" V asked, humor dancing across his voice.

"Not really," Kaz replied, pecking him again.

"We can take them with us?'

"Sure, why not?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no name for Medic and I've seen Vicente a lot so fuck it that's his name now.


	12. Chapter 12

Sure enough the next day V announced that he had gotten them seats at a 5-star restaurant. It was for the next night and, since it was high class, it had a dress code.

That meant forcing Tretij and Eli into actually proper clothing.

He took them out shopping shortly after school. Not without complaining, of course. Dave was whining about how Hal wouldn't be there, and Eli was revolted at the very idea of putting on anything more formal than a V-neck. Plus, he pointed out on many, many occasions that most of the kids' suits didn't fit Tretij.

That seemed to be solved quickly though. Tretij went straight to the dresses instead, and when Eli told him it was for girls he just shrugged.

"Tretij, can you help me find Eli something nice to wear?" Kaz asked, still gripping Eli's wrist so he didn't run off. Tretij smiled (or at least it looked like it) and nodded, his curls bouncing with his head. Eli smiled, momentarily distracted.

Turns out by, "help me find something," Kaz ended up meaning, "Keep him still while I find things that might fit him and then try and get him to try them on."

Tretij was distracting Eli by hugging him. And having him pick him up, apparently.

Eli had lifted the redhead up into the air like he weighed nothing, earning a small terrified squeak. Of course, he immediately put him down, and hugged him again.

"Sorry I scared you," He mumbled, resting up against Tretij to the best of his ability. He didn't want him to topple over. Tretij just hummed in response, taking his friend's hand and stubbornly leading him over to the dressing rooms where Kaz was.

"Noooooo," Eli whined, trying to hide behind the red head. Which was dumb, he was bigger than him in basically every metric.

[Eli, please? I wanna go to dinner but I don't wanna go without you. And if we don't go we're gonna be left with Ocelot.]

That seemed to be what it took, because Eli grabbed the suits somewhat angrily before disappearing into the dressing rooms. Kaz sighed, handing a matching suit to David, who went in with ~~no~~ less fuss.

And holy balls they looked _adorable_.

Tretij tried to clap, which just sounded like fabric hitting against itself with force.

"Tretij, please don't make me try on more," Eli whined, shifting uncomfortably.

"Papa, can we please just go home?" Dave begged, playing with the cuff.

"Go change into your normal clothes, I need a suit for myself," Kaz ordered, brushing them away gently.

The reappeared a few seconds later, both the suits being dumped on David. Eli instead held Tretij's hand, leading him through the store after Kaz.

"What do you think, yellow, blue, or red?" Kaz asked, holding up the ties.

"Red," Eli said immediately, barely even looking up.

"Yellow," Dave argued.

"T-There's one w-with bo...th," Tretij pointed out quietly, squeezing Eli's hand.

"You're right!" Kaz said happily, grabbing the tie that the redhead pointed to.

"Well?" Kaz asked, holding it up. When both the twins nodded reluctantly he disappeared into the dressing room, and when he dubbed it fitting he came back out, lifting up Tretij with one arm before proceeding to the register.

"You have very pretty children," The lady complimented, smiling gently at Tretij.

[She thinks I'm a girl. And that I'm only what, 5?]

Eli smiled brightly, _[Well, to be fair you are pretty small.]_

"Than you ma'am. Unfortunately they aren't mine--"

"Biologically," Dave cut in.

"Yes, they aren't mine biologically," Kaz smiled.

When he put Tretij down to pay he immediately grabbed Eli's arm, earning a small smile from the cashier.

The drive home was quiet and somewhat awkward, with Tretij between Dave and Eli to make sure they didn't start a fight, and a random radio station playing in the background.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first time missing an upload and its only because I forgot it was wednesday

Getting Eli back in the suit was about as difficult as getting him to try it on. When Tretij came out in his dress, a pretty sleeveless light blue knee length with yellow roses decorating the strap, Eli seemed far more open to wearing it.

His tie was red, and, well... He couldn't tie it.

"FAAATHHHERRRRR!" He hollered, his voice cracking a little. He crossed his arms as V poked his head in.

"What?" He asked, looking at the tie, "Do you know how to tie it?"

"No! I lived shirtless for years, why do I have to wear a suit now?" The blond complained, turning back to the mirror with a pout.

"Fair point. Here, I'll help," He said, walking over and crouching a little to better reach his son. Twelve-year-olds may be approaching puberty quickly, but V was 6"5. Even if Eli was full grown he would probably still crouch down.

He worked quickly, tying it with little to no thought. Of course he also had to run and help David too.

With everyone finally dressed they could leave. Of course there was a momentary panic when Kaz realized that Tretij's dress didn't come with shorts underneath, but luckily they had not only gone shopping for the chilling weather, but also spring, so finding a pair of blue shorts wasn't too hard.

With everything sorted, they finally hopped into the car, Kaz driving. He didn't trust V after seeing how he treated the jeeps.

Of course Eli and Dave had to start bickering as soon as they got in the road. Just their luck.

"Why is he in a dress? That's for girls," Dave pointed out, as if just now stopped to question it.

"Because he wants to, David!" Eli snapped, grabbing Tretij's hand.

"I don't want to wear a suit!" The brunette argued, crossing his arms.

"So? You didn't think of wearing a dress, but he did!"

"Yeah, but what if people think it's weird?"

"Then they can suck it up! He can dress how he wants, he's not hurting anyone!"

"But it's weird!"

"Your point!?"

"Boys!" Kaz huffed, glaring at them through the mirror.

"He's saying Tretij is weird!" Eli informed, as if Kaz wasn't there for the whole conversation.

"Eli, boys don't normally wear dresses, David, it's not your job to judge them if they do," He said, trying to focus on his bratty children and the road.

"Yes, papa," They both mumbled, but Eli still held onto Tretij's hand. He brightened up a little after, and Kaz could only assume that was because Tretij thanked him in their heads.

"You look nice, Tretij, I'm sorry for making fun of you," David said slowly.

"And you were right, dresses are for girls," Eli mumbled, going back to glaring at the seat in front of him.

After that distraction they still had to drive for thirty more minutes, leaving the conversation up to whatever they came up with. It was silent for a good ten minutes before Eli perked up and started talking.

"Father, papa, what does 'I love you' mean?" Eli asked, blinking.

Kaz nearly swerved off the road.

"Well... Eli, it means... it's something that two people who love each other and want to spend the rest of their lives together say. Or, you can say it to your family," V explained, but he still looked like he was about to laugh.

"Oh. What's love?" This conversation was only getting worse.

"A feeling of great compassion. Basically those fuzzy feelings you get when you see someone close to you."

"Oh. I love you, Tretij!"

Kaz had to pull over.


	14. Chapter 14

When they finally arrived Kaz was... somewhat impressed, actually. When V told him it was a nice restaurant he knew it was nice, but not like this.

Wait, where did V even have the money for food? He already said he was going to pay...

Kaz shook off the thought, getting out of the car carefully. He glanced at V again, smiling.

He already knew V looked good in suits, but damn.

V had a blue tie, paired with a dark navy suit and a lavender-tinted white shirt. Of course, Kaz couldn't see all the color through his sunglasses, but he damn sure appreciated the sight.

Tretij was holding Eli's hand, as per usual, and looked a little self-conscious.

"Tretij, calm down, you're gonna be fine," Eli attempted to soothe him, scrunching up his nose for a second before pulling a few of the red hairs away from his friend's forehead.

"H-How 'm I go-gon'a e-eat?" the redhead asked softly, letting out a big breath that puffed up the surgical mask for a second as if proving a point.

Fuck, he was right. How is he going to eat? The only way he did it normally was letting Eli essentially force-feed him without the violence in a corner away from everyone. Even then he had a few different hats pulled over his head and he was whining about a headache for a while afterward.

"You can get soup and drink it with a straw," Eli said, smiling proudly, "tomato soup doesn't have chunky things in it, you could get that!"

Kaz let out a sigh, "Eli, he can't eat like that, that's rude."

"How? He can't eat any other way!"

"Tretij, can't you just take off the mask?"

Tretij frantically shook his head, looking a little misty-eyed. Eli pulled him close to him, making a small noise in his throat.

"Why can't you?" He asked gently, crouching down to be closer to their height.

Eli leaned his head up against the redhead's before speaking in an unusually small voice.

"People make fun of him. They would call him ugly and disgusting and... they would hurt him for things that they caused themselves..."

Kaz exhaled slowly, wrapping his arms around the two. Even Dave looked concerned.

"It's okay, Tretij. If anyone even tries to hurt you then I'll take care of them myself."

He was still hugging Eli's arm when they all went inside. It took quite a lot of coaxing to get the guy to seat them when Eli stubbornly said the redhead was a boy. They had to convince him it followed the dress code.

[He thinks I'm a foreign exchange student and Mr. Kaz is your dad and V is David's dad.]

_[That's... better than some we've seen.]_

[At least he doesn't think we're siblings and claim we're... involved.]

_[that's always really weird. Plus, you look like you're about eight, why would we be dating?]_

[I've given up stopping to question the human mind.]

As they were all lead to their table Tretij seemed to relax a little. It was fine, Eli was there, and Kaz was too, and V would be willing to protect him, maybe even Dave. No one would hurt him.

Apparently even Eli wasn't brave enough to order. As soon as he started to say what he wanted his voice dropped down to half it was normally, turning from strong and bold to pitiful. He ended up having to tell Kaz what he and Tretij wanted.

Eli had gotten rice with bread, the same as Tretij, with a sprite. Tretij got a weird smoothie thing, though. Dave got lasagna, with root beer, Kaz got a burger with water, and V had gotten a salad with sprite.

Apparently Eli had never tried a soda before.

He took one sip before coughing, smacking his lips.

"What the bloody--"

"Eli, be nice," Tretij cut him off. He still hadn't removed the mask, he was just sipping on the smoothie.

"Why is it bubbly?"

"That's carbonation, Eli."

"It feels so weird."

"Eli, it's just soda."

"What's soda?"

"Um... What do you call it in England? A soft drink, or something dumb like that?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You've... never had a soda before?"

"No...?" Kaz had to laugh. The poor boy looked so confused.

"They take carbonated water and add flavoring," Kaz explained, tapping Eli's glass, "People like it."

"It takes some getting used to," V said, smiling discreetly to himself.

Eli grunted softly, before moving toward Tretij and carefully, very carefully, taking the mask off his face.

Kaz's breath caught.

He knew that the little boy was supposedly ugly, he hadn't expected to see his mouth half-stitched up. The poor boy looked... _horrific_.

Eli wrapped his arms around the redhead, as if protecting him. Tretij held onto Eli's tie, a red one, and hid his face against him.

"Told you," He mumbled, the stitches along his face stretching in a way that had to be painful.

Eli suddenly sat up, still half-holding Tretij before glaring sharply at everyone else at the table.

"It doesn't matter if he's ugly! He's still the same person!"

"We know, Eli."

"Then stop thinking about it! He's a psychic, you idiots!"

Shit. At least Eli had the decency to keep his voice down.

"Sorry, Tretij," V spoke gently.

"It's fine," He was still mumbling.

[Thank you, Eli.]

_[For what?]_

[For not... thinking less of me, when I first showed you. Most people do.]

Eli let out a little grunt again, before grabbing Tretij plate and a fork. He was feeding him.

Kaz smiled. That was cute.

They ended up taking a picture of all of them in their fancy clothes. Tretij put his gas mask back on, since it was at home, but other than that, everyone looked the same.

David and Eli were in matching suits, black, of course, with Eli is a red tie and David in yellow. Kaz was in his with the red and yellow tie, and Tretij was still kn his dress, clinging to Eli's arm. V was still in his dark blue, and goddamn they all looked good.


	15. Chapter 15

School was, as per usual, uneventful for Eli and Tretij. At this point all the teachers had given up on trying to separate them, and the one class they had apart (one of the three that they even left homeroom for) was unimportant, and easy to just space out in.

But today was an orchestra day. That meant as soon as the bell rang, signifying the end of the day, they were both out of their seats and packing up quickly, speed-walking to the gym where the rehearsals were held.

They both started unpacking as soon as they arrived, and they were one of the first ones. The only others were a random weirdo that Eli had in his class without Tretij, and a pretty blonde girl wearing a raggedy, dull olive green dress with tights pulled over her legs.

Once they found their seats, which wasn't hard, the teacher always placed them near each other despite being different instruments, they started talking.

"I-I c...ca-n't belie-e-ve y-you tri-ied to st-start a f-f-food f-fight t-to-day," Tretij said, half-scolding.

"Oh come on, that kid deserved it."

"H-H-ee c-cal-led me gg-g-inger and y-you st-arted th...throwing g-grapes at h-im."

"Yeah, he deserved it--" Then the blonde seemingly appeared, standing in front of them.

"That guy is always a butt," She censored herself despite the teacher being lenient, "Once he called me a dog, which I don't mind much, but then he kept doing it and then, the next month, asked me to date him," Her voice had a thick accent, although neither of them could identify where from.

"So he's a weirdo and a creep," Eli said, smiling somewhat triumphantly.

Tretij hummed, looking at the girl.

"You two are the ones everyone speak of, no? The two that they all say are 'gay' because they are inseparable?"

"Yeah," Tretij answered softly, shifting a little.

"Well, I have no problem if you are. Those people are just silly. My mama says that love is all that matters, and if two men marry then so be it. Although, are you two dating?" She asked, waving her bow as if gesturing with her hand.

"No, we aren't dating," Eli said, somewhat stubbornly, "But we do love each other!"

Tretij sighed deeply as the girl raised her eyebrow.

"W-We car..e f'r ea-each oth...er, an-d w-we w-want to st-tay," Tretij said to the best of his ability.

"We care a lot about each other, and we're gonna stay with each other for the rest of our lives!" Eli translated, smiling proudly.

"Well, my name is Viktoria," She said, "You are Ellie and Tre-ji, no?"

"Eli and Tretij," Eli corrected, looking a little bit upset she called him 'Ellie.'

"Seats, class!" Mr. B called, smiling his usual goofy smile.

With that, Viktoria disappeared. Well, she went back to her seat.

"First we're gonna try and go through all of Moonlight, think you guys can do it?" He said, glancing around the room, "Remember, our concert is in two weeks."

Tretij sighed deeply, somewhat irritated. This song was so _boring_.

* * *

After orchestra, when Eli was packing up, Viktoria appeared again. Of course, it was only by him this time, since Tretij had to pack up at the other side of the room.

"Do you know what love means?" She asked, seeming slightly amused.

"Of course I do! My father told me himself!" Eli said boldly, and he would've put his hands on his hips if it weren't for the fact that he was busy with his bass.

"And what does it mean?" She asked, smiling slyly.

"It's what you say to someone that you care about a lot, and you want to be with for the rest of your life."

"No, that's not it."

"Yes it is!"

"I mean, that's not all of it. You don't say that you love someone unless you wanna marry them."

"And what if I wanna marry Tretij? What do you mean then?"

"Do you?"

"Why does it matter!? I'm gonna be with him for the rest of our lives, and getting married would just make it easier."

"Don't you want to marry a girl?"

"Why should I?" Eli was confused now. Girls aren't that pretty. He's found far better looking men. Well, there were a lot of good-looking women he's seen, he knew they were good-looking, but it wasn't like he would date them. But he'd seen a lot of men he'd want to date. Especially Tretij. Tretij is pretty.

"Because that's what people normally do," She informed, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Meh. I'd rather date boys."

"You're serious?"

"Yeah. I mean, I've seen pretty girls, but I'd never date them. But there are a lot of really handsome boys that I would date.

"O...kayyyyy?"

"It's not weird. I have a father and a papa and they like each other."

"Huh. Good to know. Wanna walk home with me? I know you guys walk, I've seen you. In fact I normally walk just a little behind you until the four-way."

"Sure, why not? Hey, Tretij! Viktoria is gonna walk with us!" Eli called across the room to the redhead, who was just finishing carefully cleaning his viola of rosin and now rising to his feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor confused gay Eli.


	16. Chapter 16

When Eli very proudly announced that their concert was the next day no one blinked very much. After all, Kaz had gotten an Email and already told V, and word was spreading around the school so Dave knew just fine.

But when Eli demanded attention he was going to get it.

Luckily V was pretty good at catching when he was in these moods.

"Ya got a concert tomorrow, huh? Do you and Tretij need a ride?" He asked. Eli's face lit up at a chance to talk.

"Yes! We do!" He said loudly, sitting up in his chair. Tretij hummed and picked at his food. Not like he could eat it with the giant gas mask in his face, but he wasn't willing to get a migraine like the last time he took it off.

"Tretij, you need to eat," Eli pointed out gently, reaching up and coming a hand through the redhead's curls. The boy grunted, tossing a piece of chicken to a different part of his plate with his fork.

Eli stood up, conversation forgotten as he left to his room. At this point Kaz knew better than to question him.

He came back with every hat he could find in the entire house piled in his arms, plopping the small hill onto his seat before taking his time tugging each and every one onto Tretij's head.

"E-Eli," he protested weakly, but said nothing as the blond carefully started undoing the straps of his mask, pulling it very gently off his face. He let out a soft whimper as every mind in a five mile radius filled his, but it was far more bearable than it would be without the hats.

[You're so pretty,] Eli thought, his "voice" radiating warmth. He took a deep breath, a little surprised at how much different everything smelled without his mask.

"Y-Your scars are very cool, mister," Hal said quietly, but without even sparing a glance at him the redhead knew he was lying. He was scared of him.

He felt somewhat sick.

Eli carefully held his shoulders to keep him in place, taking his fork from him and stabbing it into the previously flung piece of chicken. He moved his free hand from his shoulder to his chin to tap on it until he opened it, before carefully feeding him his dinner.

The only person amazed at the sigh was Hal. Somewhat funny as his mind delved into confusion.

When Tretij finished eating Eli strapped the mask back on, before carefully removing all the hats. He had to re-tighten it, but that was fine.

"You two have a concert tomorrow?" Kaz had to fill the silence.

* * *

Yes, in fact, they did. 

Tretij was in his dress again, and Eli had taken his suit sans the tie and jacket. They were currently busy chatting with a girl that looked older than Tretij, but that wasn't hard to do. She was wearing a slightly worn down, stained pastel green dress with big puffy sleeves.

Kaz slowly walked over to them, unsure if it was allowed. Of course no one stopped him, and soon he was standing right next to the small group.

"Hello there, miss. My name is Kaz, I'm Eli's dad," He smiled gently at the girl, who looked on-guard.

"My name is Viktoria," She informed, tightening the grip on her instrument.

"I love your accent," He said with a smile. She exhaled a little irritably, before stalking off to the other side of the room. Fine, apparently Eli was unable to make friends with anyone nice.

"Good job, papa," Eli said, his voice oozing sarcasm. Kaz glared, before leaving to pick up V, Dave, and Hal.

With a little protesting from Dave and a two quick car rides later they were all seated, V on one end and Kaz on the other with Hal and Dave in between them, somewhere near the middle-front. Kaz's only concern was that they wouldn't be able to see Eli or Tretij. Basses went near the back, and Tretij was pretty small. Not to mention Eli had bragged on multiple occasions that the teacher was  _so cool_ that he cat them as near to each other as possible without their sections overlapping.

But first they had to sit through the band. Not that band was bad or anything, but he found that it often had many more people, and that meant many more people not willing to try. That meant that overall, it often sounded just like a random assortment of noise instead of real music. Although, music _is_ technically a random assortment of noises, so maybe he was just bias.

At least the clarinets sounded good. And the flute.

"Now that we've finished that, please excuse a brief break while the band and orchestra switch places. Unfortunately an elementary school gym in not big enough to fit both and all their parents," The teacher, a guy with a somewhat greasy looking bears, spoke smoothly, clapping his hands as he did a small hop off the podium.

The band kids slowly started filtering out, and Kaz caught a few parents get up and leave too. He snorted irritably. If the orchestra parents have to sit through their kids performance, couldn't they stay for the whole concert?

He shook off the brief irritation as the much smaller orchestra started filtering in. Unfortunately, Tretij was still wearing a hat, a white beanie this time, so he was harder to pick out than, well, a spot of bright red. Luckily though, it was pretty easy to see a kid carrying a big-ass bass.

Once he weeded out where Tretij and Eli were sitting, sure enough, very close to each other, he relaxed a little more. He slipped his old phone out of his pocket, getting ready to record. He still had to set it against his knee though, the teacher had some  things to say.

"Wow. It's kinda impressive to see how many of you are here," He said with a bright smile, "I would say how many parents support their orchestra kids, but I mean, a lot of you are probably here for Choir or band. Anyway, first I have to be a beggar and ask for money. See, as most of you that were in music programs know, we run on a finite budget. Like, really finite. We currently accept check and cash, and all the money will go right back to your kids. Okay, so NOW we're going to start playing," He let out a half-nervous chuckle.

"Our first song is gonna be not really a song, but scales! Scales make up the majority of music, and are one of the most basic things to learn. We do them as a warm-up. So, first, D-scale," He turned back to the group of kids and raised his hands, and pretty soon they were all playing. Pretty damn well, too, but that might just be because D-scale is pretty easy.

They went through a few more songs, nothing exciting on Eli and Tretij's part. Violins got the interesting parts as per usual.

After the Choir went Kaz finally got to pick up his kids. But they were talking to Viktoria again. Fuck.

He approached none-the-less, practically dragging Dave by the wrist.

"Papa can Vikki come home with us?" Eli asked before he could even get a word out. He raised an eyebrow.

"Sh-She doesn't... kn-now when-n her p-p-parent-s are gon-gonna co-come... I-If at all..." Tretij explained softly, and with that Kaz broke.

"Alright, fine, she can come," He assured, shifting a little. Viktoria smiled a little, gripping her violin like she was going to break it.

So now he was gonna house a kid that might hate him. Great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you hadn't caught on, Viktoria is supposed to be Wolf.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, guys, if you ever wanna ask me questions about this my tumblr is solidsnakessolidcakes, you can message me if you want!

How did they manage to fit five kids and two adults into one car meant for five people?? Not legally, that's how.

Eli and Tretij were squeezed into one seat, Dave in between them, and Viktoria and Hal on the other side. Yep, they were double-buckling. Kaz just had to be extra careful.

"So, you two are Eli's parents?" She asked, her accent still heavy, "I'd assume you got a surrogate mother?"

"Uh, not exactly. He was a kid of an ex-friend of ours but ended up running away," Kaz explained, turning on his turn signal.

"Oh, and David, too? Interesting. They do look like you two."

"Mere coincidence, I'm afraid."

"And what about Tretij? Is he adopted, as well?"

"Not really. We take care of him but we're not his parents. We don't plan on adopting him, but he and Eli are very close."

"Yes, there are many people claiming that they are dating. Silly, if you ask me."

"Y'know we're in the car, right?" Eli cut in rudely.

"Calm down, Eli," V scolded gently. He just grumbled and turned away.

The rest of the drive was sat through in comfortable silence, aside from the long yawn that came from Tretij about halfway there.

Once they got inside Eli lead Viktoria straight to the fridge, and grabbed a few snacks for her. She ate them surprisingly fast.

"You can take the other bed, Tretij and I can share one," He said, grabbing Tretij's hand as he lead her to their room. Tretij immediately grabbed his gas mask.

"Why are you wearing that?" She asked curiously, placing her hands comfortably on her hips.

"It feels better."

And that was the only explanation she got. She never asked again.

They ended up setting up a small nest of blankets in the living room, and treated it like a sleepover. After all, it was Friday night.

"What do you want to watch?" Eli asked, shuffling through Kaz's various CD's. Viktoria got up to look with him.

"Wow, this is all so boring. Tell your dad to get better taste."

"Most of these are in Japanese, anyway. Oh, wait! Here we go! An actually English one! _The Little Mermaid_. The hell?"

With that they popped it into the DVD player, setting in the mass of blankets. Tretij moved to lay on Eli's lap, yawning. Viktoria snorted.

"He looks like a cat."

"It's fine, he's light anyway," Eli dismissed it, running a hand through the other boy's hair. He hummed contently.

The movie droned on, with a few remarks about how Ariel's hair was the same color as Tretij's. Once it was over they had ran out of things to do.

"M-Mr. Kaz got m-me a g-g-game..." Tretij said softly, slowly sitting up. Eli wrapped an arm around his middle, making sure he didn't fall off his thigh.

"Did he? I don't remember..." Eli scowled.

"H-He did... I jus' din... tell you," Tretij struggled to speak, his words slurring together as his tired mind struggled to remember English.

"Why? You tell me everything," He looked hurt. Very hurt.

"I... I'm sor... s...Promiňte"

," He whimpered, his voice heavy and small.

Eli sighed, pulling him closer and letting him rest his chin on his head.

"Where is it, Tretij? Tell Vikki where to find it," He ordered, playing with a red curl.

"Ah... V televizním stojanu ... v zásuvce."

"English please."

"Engli...? Uh... Mph," He ended up just pointing. Viktoria stood up and checked, eventually pulling out a CD case with the word "CASTLEVANIA" written across it in a strange font.

Once they got it running, with some unhelpful Czech instructions from Tretij, they ended up playing it for hours.

They... finished it.

They finished the entire goddamn game.

Fuck.

And Tretij had fallen asleep in Eli's lap.

Double fuck.

Eli ended up carrying Tretij to their room, laying him in his bed while Vikki took Tretij's normal bed. Eli scooted the redhead over until he managed to lay next to him, which was a pretty tight fit but it didn't matter.

And they slept through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Castlevania probably didn't come out when Mantis was a baby but fuck it. I do what I want. Also the Czech was done in google translate so it's probably pretty bad bdnbjingr I'm sorry


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kskksksk sorry I'm dumb and missed another upload

Conferences were hitting again. And this time, they got to meet with all their teachers, for Tretij and Eli. At least they didn't have to deal with Hal's conferences too, Ocelot said he would do it.

And of course, of _course_ , Eli and Tretij would be having one of those days where they refused to separate.

Well, they had mostly the same teachers anyway.

"Eli come on, it's your conference time. No, Tretij can't go with you!" Kaz tried to pull Eli away from Tretij, on the verge of just picking both of them up and asking to have their conferences together.

And that's apparently what he had to do.

He lifted both of them, which would be impressive considering they're both twelve, until you take into consideration that Tretij is small and underweight and Kaz is a 6"0 trained soldier. He then promptly carried them inside the classroom, where Eli's teachers were waiting at one of those semi-circle tables but there's a whole but out.

"Mr. Miller," The homeroom teacher sounded surprised, "Um, so they're both coming? Should I call Mrs. Dingle and Mr. Yenny?"

"Yeah, sorry. They're having one of those days where they won't leave each other's sides." He pulled them a little higher up, trying not to drop them.

Once all the teachers were there and Eli and Tretij were seated (Eli sat in a chair and Tretij sat on his lap) they finally got started.

"So, here are Eli's grades for the past year." She pushed forward a sheet. They were all... good, not great. Mostly B's and A-'s. He had a C in science and a D is geography though. At least he wasn't failing reading anymore.

"What'd you have against geography?" He asked jokingly. Eli glared.

"It's dumb. Why do I need to know the capital of every state? It's not like I'm gonna go there," He argued. Kaz sighed deeply. Great, it's gonna be one of those arguments.

"Eli, it's for your grade."

"Why is it part of my grade? It shouldn't be!"

"Why?"

"Because I'm not gonna go there! What use does it have!?"

"You need to do it, Eli."

"No."

Eli probably would've crossed his arms if it weren't for the fact that Tretij was still sitting in between his legs.

"Well, you have your best grade in orchestra. Why is that?"

".... Kids work better when they actually respect the teacher."

"Eli, you need to respect all of them."

"Then they need to respect _me_!"

"Eli, you're younger than them."

"Your point?"

"Jesus Christ, why are you like this?"

Eli rolled his eyes so hard Kaz almost thought they were going to fall out of his head.

"That's another thing we need to talk about," One of the teachers spoke up, "He never shows us any respect at all."

Mr. B, the orchestra teacher, blinked.

"He's always great in my class. Really, one of the nicest kids. He always helps everyone, he's really nice. I've never had any problems," He praised. Eli smiled at him. It was... almost impressive how happy and proud he looked.

"So, Eli, orchestra is your favorite class, because...?" One of them leaned forward. Eli's smile dropped.

"Because the teacher respects us. He's willing to admit he was wrong and learn from his students, even though he's the teacher. He knows that we're not _just_ kids, we're people with experiences."

It was surprising how easily the words came out, how little hesitation there was. It was like he had thought of this beforehand. Which, I mean, he probably had.

"And you're saying that your other teachers don't?"

"Yes. They always make excuses instead of just saying they're wrong, and they're always so... patronizing." Kaz couldn't tell if the pause was for drama or genuine lack for words. Knowing Eli, probably drama.

"Well, we'll try to take that into account. Now we should start on Trey-gee."

" _Tretij_."

"Tretij, yes. Here are her-- sorry, his grades from the last year." At least he got better ones than Eli did, sort of. A- in reading, A in math, B- in geography, and B- in science. Somehow fitting that the only one Eli would beat him in would be science.

"And ah-- is there any way he can... Hm... Can he cover up his face more? It's distracting other kids," A woman with a horribly nasally voice spoke.

"Excuse me?" Kaz raised an eyebrow, giving her the stink-eye. Judging from the way Tretij deflated like a sad balloon, this had happened before.

"There are kids that can't pay attention because he has those scars--"

"Ma'am, his previous home life is none of your business," Eli snapped, leaning forward and pulling Tretij closer, "Stop judging him based on his face and instead pay attention to the person, like you're supposed to."

At least Eli was getting into trouble for a just cause this time.

"Miss, he's right, I don't think that's fair at all. Kids being distracted by him is not his fault, considering he's not doing anything to be distracting. Instead, how about you teach your students some more self control?" He almost wanted to whip off his glasses to glare at her properly.

"I was just thinking--"

"Listen, if no one else has anything to say I'm gonna leave. I'm not gonna let you bully my kid for having scars over something he can't control. Now, that's all? Great, have a nice day."


	19. Chapter 19

With summer quickly approaching, Eli was getting restless. And that meant Tretij was too.

So that meant that they were finally, finally actually going outside. And looking at bugs. That's all they were doing.

"Eli, b-bug!" The redhead dropped down to his knees, scooping up a small ant.

"That's an ant. They're pretty common," Eli knelt down, taking one on his own finger. Tretij hummed happily.

"Very pretty," He cooed, letting it crawl onto his thumb before he put it down. Eli smiled, putting his down too.

"Mm! Oth-ther bug!" He quickly walked up to a windowsill on their apartment complex, touching a finger down in front of a small ladybug.

"Mm-hmm. It's called a ladybird. Isn't it pretty?" Truth be told, Eli hadn't seen Tretij this excited in a while.

"Prett-ty bug~" He hummed, giggling gently when it crawled onto his hand.

"Very pretty," The blond agreed, carefully combing down a few stay curls.

"I wa-nna keep h-her..." He sounded sad. Eli glanced between the bug and the boy a few times before starting to giggle. Tretij's big blue eyes turned to him in confusion.

"S-Sorry, it's just... Well, the bug looks like you! With the black and the red..." He let out a few more hysterical giggles. Tretij giggled too.

"Mmn... M-Maybe I do l-ook like bug! But bug is pr-etty!"

"Yep! So that means you're pretty!"

"I'm pretty?"

"Of course!"

Tretij started giggling more, a blotchy pink color appearing on his cheeks.

"Eheh... Um, c-can we go back in-inside, Eli? Head hurts..."

"Of course. But you need to put the bug down, I think Hal would be scared of it."

"Mmm... But she's pretty... mph. Good-bye, ladybirdie!" He waved at it after setting it down before grabbing Eli's arm, letting him lead him inside.

Tretij quickly put his mask back on, a long breath wheezing through the filter.

"Eli, do I lo-ok pretty w-with mask, too?" He turned around, nearly hitting the the boy in the face with the nozzle.

"Of course you do! Pretty might have an outside element, but it's mostly what you're like on the inside! And you're super sweet to _me_ , so I think you're very pretty!" He gave him a lopsided grin that showed off the gap in his teeth. And while he couldn't see his face, he just knew Tretij was smiling back at him.

"Mm! Mmmm! Bug! Buggie!" He tore away from Eli to hurry over to the windowsill, scooping up a small, stick-like green bug.

"Ah-- Tretij! That's a mantis! It could hurt you, put it down! How is it even over here!?" He approached carefully, yet his voice was filled with panic. Tretij just stared at him, bug still in his hands.

"It doesn't bite. It's prett-ty, and cute!" He held out the bug toward Eli, who quickly jumped away. He remembered in a distant part of his brain that praying mantises don't bite humans, or at least very very rarely, so he just tried to sit calmly on the bed.

"Cute bug~" He hummed, watching the thing crawl over him.

Eli smiled, watching. "That one looks more like you."

"...Really?"

"Yep. It looks a lot like you, in fact. Maybe I should call you Mantis!"

"... I like it."

"R-really? I was, uh, joking."

"I like it. Call me th-that. Tretij seems... o-objectif-ying sometimes..."

"Oh. Sorry."

"Not your fault."


	20. Chapter 20

Apparently Mantis' birthday was coming soon. Really soon. As in, it was next week. And he didn't tell anyone but Eli.

Shit.

So that meant that now Kaz had to plan a twelve year birthday party in a week. Less than that.

So the first thing he did was pull Eli aside.

"Is there anything he wants? Like, a toy or something?" He grabbed the younger's shoulders, slightly panicked.

"Mmmm... He likes bugs. I dunno, there's not much he thinks is interesting. Mostly just bugs and people that hate everything."

"Great. Does he have any friends?"

"That don't live here? Only Viktoria, unless you count the Man on Fire, but he wasn't really friends with him, more co-workers."

"Yeah, and the Man on Fire is dead. Please tell me you can block things out of his head?"

"I've never tried. Why would I?"

"Right, I forgot you trust him more than your own twin brother."

"David is a dick."

"Eli don't say that. Especially about your brother."

"It's true though."

"Don't say it, please." Kaz sighed, running a hand over his face.

"Alright, here, I'm going to take you, Hal, and Dave present shopping. Don't tell him what we buy. Just try not to think specifically about it, okay?" He patted Eli's head, walking back to the kitchen.

When they finished eating Kaz loaded everyone into the car, bidding V a quick goodbye and letting Eli and Tretij give their over dramatic goodbye hug. Once they had drove enough that Eli probably couldn't still communicate with Tretij, he spoke again.

"Do you have Viktoria's phone number or anything? Any way to contact her?"

"No."

"Do you know where she lives?"

"North of school. Sometimes Mantis and I run into her when we're playing outside.

"Who's Mantis?"

"Tretij. He says he likes Mantis better, it feels less objectifying."

"Oh. Well, do you think once we get the presents you can go find her? Ask her to come over tomorrow?"

"Sure. But Mantis is definitely going to find out."

"Eli..."

"Not like I can control it!"

"Fine, fine," He pulled into the parking lot, helping Hal out of his seat and leading everyone inside.

"So Tr-- Mantis likes bugs and...?" He looked down at Eli, who shrugged.

"Pokemon, I guess. He thinks the psychic ones are cool," he said, glancing around the isles.

"Anything else?" Bugs and Pokemon were broad topics.

"Long sweaters." Eli shrugged again.

"Faaantastic," Kaz breathed, scanning the isles before leading the kids to the toys section.

Hal picked out the first present. It was a pack of Pokemon cards that had an Espeon on the front. He grabbed it after Eli pointed to it to say that Espeon was Mantis' favorite.

Dave picked the second one, it was a little fuzzy caterpillar plushie. Around that time Kaz noticed that Eli wasn't with them anymore.

He furrowed his eyebrows, looking down the next isle. Nothing.

"Eli?" He called quietly, moving to the next isle.

Maybe he'd be near the girls' toys?

No. He wasn't.

 _Shit_.

"Eli?" He called again, still wandering through the store. You'd think finding a bright blonde twelve year old would be easy.

"Papa!" Eli practically appeared out of thin air, holding a thick white book in his arms, "I found something!"

"... You left us, to go find a book about bugs."

"It's called The Order of Mantodea. It's like praying mantises!"

"You left us, to find a book, about bugs!? Eli, I was worried!"

"Sorry, but he's gonna like it, so like..."

"Eli don't leave like that!"

"Sorry."

"Oh my god, let's just go home."


	21. Chapter 21

Mantis knew they were throwing a party. He wasn't really certain he wanted a party, since, after all, people are stressful, but they were only inviting Vikki.

He also didn't know what they were getting him. They had all been told never to think directly about it. Mantis didn't like not knowing.

So he sulked. A lot. Mostly toward Eli.

Nothing too bad, he really didn't want him to be upset, but there was a lot of the silent treatment. And, Mantis stopped crawling into bed with him when he got nightmares. Which made it really difficult to calm down.

Multiple times a week Mantis would shoot up out of his bed sheets in a cold sweat, most of the times with tears streaming down his cheeks. He found the most common nightmares were about his father or loosing Eli. That's why he would crawl in next to Eli. To reassure himself that he was there.

Eli had started waking up when Mantis did. It was like a sixth sense, when he heard sheets rustling violently he would open his eyes.

He was pretty fucking upset that Mantis stopped cuddling with him. He thought that he was Mantis' support system, that he would be the one to comfort him.

But he had the newfound power of burying things so deep down that Mantis didn't notice unless he went looking for it. And he didn't really have a lot of time to focus on Eli's mind.

But that didn't mean it didn't affect him.

One day when he heard the rustling the snapped.

"Oh my god, Tretij, go to sleep!" He sat up, mouthing off to his only friend. Mantis flinched, looking at him with that Eli could only assume were hurt eyes. He growled, bundling up his own bed sheets in his fists before lunging at the redhead, who let out a terrified squeak.

The both tumbled off the bed, the two of the flailing around helplessly. The tussling continued until there was a sickening crunch when Eli landed a punch on his chest. Mantis cried out, kicking away from him.

The door creaked open, and the light flicked on. Eli put a hand over his eyes.

"What's going on? Out of anyone I expected you to control yourself around _him_ , Eli!" Kaz snapped, and when Eli could actually see he saw the blond lifting the smaller boy up.

"How do you feel, Mantis? Do we need to go to the hospital? Do you think he broke anything?" He asked gently, and when Mantis hesitantly shook his head he turned his attention to Eli.

"Grab a couple blankets, you're gonna sleep out in the living room. You can't just attack people like this."

"Sorry, Mantis," Eli whimpered, getting up and grabbing a pillow and his blanket.

Venom was awake when Eli went to set up camp, and gave him a strange look in the dim light.

"You tried to fight Mantis? Seriously Eli, I thought you finally made a friend," He scolded, making Eli look down in shame.

"I-I know... I just..." He really didn't mean to tear up. He really didn't. But before he could finish his sentence his eyes were getting blurry with tears.

"Woah-- Hey! You okay? Oh my god, why are you crying? Are you alright?" Venom got up off the couch, kneeling in front of him.

The blond just sobbed, with whole body shaking. He didn't mean to attack him. He loves him! He was his only friend!

"I-I wan'... I wan' t... M-Mantie..." By now Kaz has put Mantis back to sleep and was coming into the living room to lecture him. Of course he immediately changed his mind and knelt down to talk to him.

"Eli? How are you feeling?"

"I-I... I didn't... I..." He was hyperventilating and crying and shit so much was happening and fuck.

"Do you want to talk to Mantis again?"

"Nooo! No! He's gon'... he- he's m-mad... he's gonna... H-he..." The real sentence was  _he's going to be mad at me,_ but through his tears he couldn't manage to say it.

"Alright Eli, calm down. You can take the couch. V, you can stay with me. Is there something going on, Eli? Like, something a school...?"

"Mm-mmmm... Ma-m... Tr..."

"Alright Eli, it's okay. It's alright, I'm sure he's not that upset..."

_[Eli, are you okay?]_

[I'm sorry, sorry, I didn't mean to, I swear, I'm sorry.]

_[Don't worry, Eli. I'm not upset, it just hurts a little. I'm not mad. Please don't be upset.]_

[I'm sorry.]

He felt two small arms wrap around his neck, and the soft wheezing of a gas mask filled the air. Plastic thumped against his shoulder.

"Eeeeeli," Mantis hummed, starting to sway slightly. Eli whimpered pathetically, turning around to stuff his face in Mantis' hair. The redhead hummed approvingly, swaying gently to a non-existent beat.

Before long the sobbing just turned to little whines, the blond practically asleep.

"Alright, Mantis, do you think you can get Eli to bed?" Kaz asked gently, brushing away the hair from Eli's face.

Mantis nodded a tiny bit and like that they were gone, disappearing in a small cloud of smoke.


	22. Chapter 22

Most of the time when he woke up next to Eli is was a good day. Today was no exception so far.

He woke up to Eli pressing his whole body up against him, his head shoved up against his collarbones and his arms wrapped possessively around his middle. He was snoring the tiniest bit.

"Eli, It's time to get up," He murmured, reaching a hand up to play with the blond's hair. Said blond let out a tiny little sigh, compressing as if he was trying to get closer.

"Mmm-mmmmm..." He finally moved his head away from Mantis', sitting up sleepily. Mantis tried to sit up himself, but since it was a small twin bed he ended up half in Eli's lap.

"Eli, wake up, Mr. Kaz has a party planned."

"Nooooo Mantis... Mmmm... you're really warm..." Eli wrapped his arms around him again, holding him up against his torso.

"It's time to get up. No exceptions."

"No."

"Eli..."

"You're warm."

" _Eli_!"

"Nooooooooooooooooooooo." With a sigh Mantis lifted Eli with his powers, plopping him down on the floor. Eli let out a little grunt.

"Hhhhappy birthday Mantis," He slurred, rubbing his eyes with a long yawn.

"Thank you, Eli. Now get dressed."

"What do you want me to wear?"

"... I'm... Not certain. I like your old outfit, the jacket is nice."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Okay!" Eli popped up, digging through his dresser to find the taped green jacket with his shorts. He put them on quickly with a certain level of familiarity. "You can wear your old outfit too, if you want. You look really good in black."

"R-Really?" Mantis couldn't help but smile. He thought he looked the same (ugly) in every outfit.

"Yeah! I can find it for you if you want." He didn't need an answer, he was already going through Mantis' clothes. Before long he was in the admittedly comfortable straitjacket, his red hair seeming to stand out even more.

"You're so cute!" Eli praised, scooping him up into a tight hug. He just gently hit him with his sleeve.

They walked out of their room together, with Mantis trying to ignore how tight his chest felt. Probably the growing bruise.

"Good morning, you two. Mantis, I made you a smoothie, you just shove the straw under your mask." Kaz smiled at them, almost nervously.

Eli grabbed the smoothie for Mantis, leading him over to the table. Once they got it fixed to where he could drink it, Kaz set a plate in front of him.

"Are you two going to get along today?"

"Be quiet, old man."

"Eli, be nice."

"That was a one time thing, okay!? I didn't even mean to do it!"

Mantis let out a small noise, leaning up against Eli.

"Please don't argue..."

"Sorry, Mantis." He shoved the straw back under the redhead's mask.

The second person to arrive was V, who was still yawning quietly. Kaz set a similar plate to Eli's in front of him, bacon with a waffle and scrambled eggs. V just got bigger portions.

David and Hal appeared last, hand in hand, both looking appropriately exhausted. They got the same plate as Eli and with that Kaz finally stopped cleaning and sat down.

"David, do you know what day it is?" Kaz asked patiently, looking up that the brunette. Said brunette squinted in concentration, interrupted by a long yawn.

"It's Sunday," He slurred, rubbing his eyes. Kaz sighed.

"Anything else?"

"Um..."

Mantis deflated a little. He didn't really expect everyone to remember his birthday, after all he had't celebrated it since burning his village down and even then the celebrations were either small and lonely or a week after. His father hadn't been good at remembering when it came to him. But he had at the very least hoped that David would remember.

"It's Mantis' birthday!" Eli hit the back of David's head, making V grab his hand as a warning.

"Oh-- Happy birthday T-- Mantis!" Dave held the back of his head, giving Mantis a strained smile. The redhead just sighed deeply, swirling his straw around. Eli escaped V to wrap his arms around his friend.

Once they had finished breakfast there was a small knock on the door, and when Kaz unlocked it Vikky ruched inside.

"Mantie! Happy birthday!" She sang, lifting the redhead off the floor in a hug. He squeaked, grabbing onto her arms in an attempt to not be dropped. "I couldn't really get a gift, we don't have the money for that, but I did find a rock! I thought it looked cool!" She set him down, grabbing said rock out of her pockets and handing it to him. He looked confused.

_[Eli, are you supposed to get gifts on your birthday?]_

[...yes? You didn't know that? I thought you had a more normal childhood than I did.]

_[We didn't celebrate birthdays at my house. I think. Actually, more that my dad never bothered to remember.]_

Eli walked over and wrapped his arms around him again, securing him in a gentle hug.

"What are you two wearing?" Vikky's tone was half accusatory. Eli shot her a lop-sided grin.

Most of the rest of the day was spent either watching TV or playing video games, there really wasn't much to do. Although Vikky did insist on braiding both boy's hair. It mostly just made Mantis' even more a frizzy mess.

Then finally they got to eat cake. It was a little after dinner, about twenty minutes, and everyone was slowly getting impatient.

Kaz set the (store-bought) cake in front of Mantis, who started squirming when he lit the candles. Everyone cleared their throats and started singing.

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Mantis! Happy birthday to you!" Eli leaned up against him, carefully lifting his mask so he could (sadly) blow out the candles.

[I love you Mantis.]

_[I love you too.]_

He opened his first gift a little wearily. He wasn't certain he liked the crinkly paper.

It was a small back of thin cards with bright creatures on it. After a little bit of staring he identified it as a pack of Pokemon cards. He looked up and Hal and gave him a small smile, hearing his mind echo with pride.

The next one was bigger, and when he searched through it he found a long, soft caterpillar. He smiled brightly this time, hugging it close to his body.

"Thank you David," He smiled again, coiling the "little" thing up in his lap.

The next gift was a little smaller, and Eli was squirming with excitement. Mantis carefully moved aside the now sparkly paper to see a thick book. He lifted it out, and immediately started smiling.

On the cover was a picture of the stick-like bug he and Eli were looking at the other day. He didn't exactly understand a lot of the words, but he couldn't help but be excited.

"Thank you Eli," He threw his arms around him neck, clenching his eyes shut. The blond laughed, hugging him back.


	23. Chapter 23

David had his own problems at school, believe it or not. He just didn't lash out at teachers.

It was more with the students than anything. Once the girls obsessing over Eli had realized that he was completely uninterested in every way, they went to the next best thing. His brother.

Most of every day was spent trying to ignore a gaggle of girls surrounded him, flirting and gossiping. Mostly about Eli and Mantis. They were like the stereotype of middle school girls come up life, lip gloss and all.

He just wanted to hang out with Hal...

Speaking of Hal, the girls had their own beef with him. The main one, Tanya, liked to help with the second graders, and every time she did Hal would come back home with a new story of how mean they were. Most of the time he was crying.

"Omigod, Sarah, do you see them? They're like, so gay. Who cuddles with their brother during class?" Tanya whispered conspiratorially, pointing toward Eli and Mantis. David suppressed a snarky comment.

"Omigod, they're so weird!" Sarah whispered back, and without even looking at her Dave could see the way she put the tips of her fingers to her heart as if she had been greatly offended.

"Hey, freak! Get off him for once!" Tanya leaned forward, grabbing Mantis' shoulder. Eli pointedly moved her hand, wrapping his own arm around the redhead's shoulder.

"I'm sorry you have a problem, but I would refrain from mocking my friend if I were you." You could always tell how irritated Eli was based on what language he used. The more petulant and whiny, the more upset, the more overly-formal the more 'done-with-your-bullshit' he was.

"You guys don't have to sit like that," Sarah jumped in. Mantis shifted uncomfortably, away from the blond. Of course said blond immediately pulled him closer to prove a point.

"You don't have to spend all day talking shit, yet look at you," He gave him an overly-sweet smile, turning back to the board with his arm still around the redhead.

"Mrs. W! Mrs. W Eli said a bad woooooorrrrrd!" Tanya raised her hand, not bothering to wait until the teacher was finished speaking. David put his head in his hands.

"Eli, please use school-appropriate language," Mrs. W scolded, obviously just wanting this school year to be finished so she wouldn't have to deal with the blond again.

"Mrs. W, they called Mantis a freak," Eli responded, his voice somewhat dry. Mrs. W just sighed and turned back to the board.

Even during recess the girls would follow him around, still bitching about everything that came to mind, even turning to David and asking him if he agreed. He normally just ignored them. Sometimes he even considered asking to hang out with Eli, Mantis and Vikky.

Part of the problem was that he couldn't find any friends his age. He had only really made friends with Hal, and that was mostly because they lived together.

He sighed, getting up and walking away from the group of girls. Surprisingly they didn't notice this time.

He wandered father and farther away, just absentmindedly thinking about anything that popped into his head.

"Excuse me? Dave?" A small voice from behind him called out, and when he spun around the girl flinched back.

It was one of the girls in the group, Holly, if David remembered right. She was the one that shit-talked the least, but she still gossiped a lot.

"Yeah, what?" His guard was already thrown up. She frowned the tiniest bit, adjusting the green headband keeping her hair away from her face. Dave touched his own bandanna.

"I uh, saw you walking away and thought you looked lonely..." She shrugged. He shrugged back. She smiled, shrugging again. He followed suit.

This went on for a minute until she burst into giggles, resting her hands on her bent knees. She looked back up, her brown eyes meeting Dave's.

"Dave! Heyyyy, man!" A sudden shout came from somewhere from the side. Dave blinked, he knew the voice was one he had heard before but certainly didn't belong to someone he was close to.

He felt an arm wrap around his shoulder and before he could get a look at who it was he was looking at the ground getting a noogie.

When he finally managed to stumble away from the perpetrator he was face to face with Frank Jaeger, one of his classmates. He was the one that always had a red headband on, including now.

Holly sat there a moment with Frank talked about shit David supposedly knew about, before huffing and leaving. Oh well.

"Sorry about that, man. Figured you'd want a break from 'er," He explained as soon as Holly was out of earshot, showing off a crooked smile. Dave hesitantly smiled back.

"So you're Eli's twin brother, right?" Dave cringed silently, wishing he would be known for more than that.

"Yes, I am," He muttered quietly, trying not to seem too nervous.

"Alright, sick! Can you... tell me why he's always attached to that one kid, Tretij I think?"

"Uh, I don't actually really know... I only met Eli less than a year ago and Mantis was there before I was."

"You met your twin brother a year ago?"

"Less than that, yeah. Our dad was... deemed unfit for taking care of kids so we were b...both put into foster care until papa and dad adopted us." He actually didn't know if Eli was put into foster care. It seemed likely but at the same time...

"Oh. Sorry man. I'm guessing you don't know how he met Tretij?"

"Um, he's going by Mantis now. But no, I don't."

"Huh. Anyway, they're pretty weird. Are they, like... gay? I don't really care if they are, but I just... Wanna know, I guess."

"I'm pretty sure they like each other but don't realize it yet. They're both pretty emotionally unstable and I don't think either of them had a friend before each other, they might just think the fluffy feelings are platonic. But they do tell each other they love each other but that's because Eli is dumb and got the definition of love wrong."

"Oh. Well, I ship it."

"What?"


	24. Chapter 24

Eli and Mantis were both pretty excited that school was ending in only a few weeks. So excited, in fact, that sometimes Mantis forgot to keep his powers in check.

The first emotion through the whole school when the fire alarm went off was panic.

"Everyone this isn't a drill! Line up right now!" The teacher shouted, jumping to her feet to lead the class out the door.

Mantis whimpered, grabbing onto Eli's arm in an effort to support himself. Unfortunately, the fire alarms didn't turn of automatically. So, even when Mantis corrected his mistake, they were still screeching.

Having alarms going off wasn't good for a headache.

"Mantis? Are you okay?" Eli asked gently, grabbing his shoulders once they got outside. The poor boy was on the edge of collapsing.

"H-h-head h...hu-rts...." He mumbled, grabbing at his head. The blond helped him stay up right, glancing around in a half-panic.

Vikki ran over to them, helping support him. "What happened!? Is he okay?"

"We need more hats- or-or a gas mask? He-- Can you maybe find some?"

"I'll say smoke got in his lungs, some teachers are too dumb to realize that's bull-- crap."

"Thanks Vikki."

She ran off, leaving Mantis slumped up against Eli.

"Hey, Vikki is gonna find a mask for you. It's gonna be silent, won't that be nice?" Eli tangled his hand in the red curls. The other boy just whimpered, after all, the whole school was in his range.

"ELI MILLER!" Mrs. W shouted, approaching them quickly, "What did you do to him!?"

Suddenly Mantis started screaming, a loud, long shriek splitting the air. Everyone else went silent, but Mantis only continued to scream.

"M-mantis, what happened!? Come on, you-- are you okay? Mantis!?" Eli tried to move away from him, but that made Mantis scream louder.

"Tray-gee, what happened?" Mrs. W asked, approaching him to put a hand on his back. He started screaming _louder_ somehow, scrambling to be squished against Eli away from her.

Eli looked up to glare at his teacher.

"Ma'am, _please_ leave."

"What's wrong with him?"

"Leave."

Mrs. W got up, walking away quickly. Now Mantis was both screaming and crying, although the screaming was fading.

Once everyone started talking again Vikki appeared.

"What the hell just happened?" She whispered, handing Eli a clunky, slightly too big gas mask. It was better than nothing.

"I don't know," He responded, strapping the mask onto the poor boy. He was still crying, but it was a lot fainter.

"Mantis? Can you tell us what happened?" He asked gently, rubbing where the plastic met skin. Mantis hummed sleepily.

"университет" He slurred, before blinking a couple times and repeating himself, in English this time, "Her husband worked at the... the u-univer-si-ty, she- she recognized... I d-didn't notice until..."

"Mantis? What was the university?" Eli continued to hold him, despite him being able to stand now.

"The place," He gasped, grabbing his arm. He flinched back, surprised his friend got so aggressive.

"Mantis? The-- the place you showed me? With the doctors?" The redhead nodded, his curls bouncing.

"And her husband worked there?" Another nod.

"She- she recognizes me, I-I-I don't wanna... I don't w-wanna go back!" He was hyperventilating again.

"Mantis, hey, hey look at me. I promise I won't let them even come near you. Alright?"

"Eeeeeeeeli."

"I won't either!"

"See Mantis? Vikki and I will protect you. I promise."


	25. Chapter 25

School was slowly coming to a close, and that meant that the teachers had more or less stopped caring. Holly came to school in a crop top and no one blinked.

But it also meant that it was getting warmer. So, of course, if Mantis tried to wear his usual sweatshirt and shirt, he would be a hot, sweaty mess. Now, he actually liked being hot, he was basically a hot box already, but being sweaty was a different story.

So that meant more clothes shopping. They had already bought clothes for summer, but apparently the redhead grew a lot more than they thought he would and almost all of them were on the very edge of being too small. Strangely enough, none of them were too tight. That might just be his weight though.

So, after donating the barely used clothes, they left for Kohls.

"So what kinds of clothes do you wanna buy?" Kaz asked, more or less following Eli and Mantis. He was met with a small grunt from Eli.

This time Mantis lead them to the boy's section, turning shyly toward Eli. The blond smiled, wandering off.

"Where is he going?"

"H-He... I asked h-him to fi-nd so-something."

"Oh. He's coming back, right?"

"Y-Yes."

"Good," He looked around at the clothes near them, holding up a few shirts and shorts against Mantis. He ended up putting nearly all of them away, keeping a loose blouse-like dark blue shirt.

Eli came back a little later, with a small pile of clothes wrapped up in his arms.

"Mantis! I got you a bunch of stuff-- most of it is black-- and I found a jacket that's light weight and it's leather too and it reminded me if you."

"Eli, we can't buy all of that."

"I know! But I wanna see him try them!"

"Alright, we'll pick our favorites, I guess." Kaz sighed, leading them to the dressing room.

Mantis grabbed the blouse-thing and a pair of leggings first. When Kaz asked where Eli found the leggings he gave him a barely guilty look and muttered "the girl's section."

The blouse-shirt was really loose on him, looser than it was meant to be, and he said he didn't like it much. He liked the leggings, though.

After that was a tank top with a little unicorn on it and a sensible, yet still short, pair of shorts. Kaz was starting to think Eli had only grabbed things from the girl's section.

"Mantis you look adorable!" Immediately Eli was gushing, his voice filled with affection. Mantis smiled.

"So keep both of them?" Kaz shifted his weight, setting down the pile of clothes on a table.

"Maybe not the shorts..." Eli pursed his lips. He had to try not to laugh, he had never taken him for a fashionista.

"Th-they feel we-ird," The redhead agreed. He grabbed a new set, a pair of skinny jeans and a black tank top.

"Why did you grab so many tank tops?" He asked in a low voice.

"I like seeing the freckles on his arms," the younger blond responded in an equally low voice. At that Kaz snorted.

"How do you know he even has freckles on his arms?"

"One time he got really hot at night so I told him to take off his shirt."

"You're..."

"What?"

"...Never mind."

Mantis came out of the stall with his arms folded, although that was a regular position for him.

"Perfect," Eli said immediately, smiling brightly. He smiled back. "You look pretty! We're keeping both of those."

"Alright, now just... five more outfits to go..."

They ended up buying a pair of black leggings, and pair of grey leggings, a couple pairs of skinny jeans, a pair of shorts, a couple different tank tops, a couple short sleeve shirts, and a loose lightweight sweater like thing. And the jacket Eli mentioned.

Mantis looked pretty guilty they were buying all that stuff for him, but the whole way home Eli was gushing about how adorable he looked in all of them.


	26. Chapter 26

To say Eli couldn't keep his mouth shut would be an under-exaggeration. That man blabbed about practically anything told to him unless he was told explicitly to keep it a secret.

"Oh papa!" he practically threw the door open, throwing himself in between Kaz and V, who were laying comfortably on the bed.

"Yes, Eli?" Kaz asked, trying to keep the irritation out of his voice.

"Mrs. W is like, super evil."

"What makes you say that?"

"Before she was married to one of the scientists that would hurt Mantis."

"What?" Now he sat up, looking down at the younger blond with a mix of curiosity and protectiveness.

"Mantis told me the other day, when she called home over him having a breakdown. She was married to one of the scientists that would try to experiment on him," Eli explained, almost too casual.

"And-- this is your homeroom teacher?" He couldn't help but feel his blood boil. Poor little Mantis had been _traumatized_ by those fucking scientists, if there was even a chance that he would have to go back there Kaz would loose it.

"Yeah. And he said she recognizes him."

"Motherfucker..."

He sighed, rising from the bed and onto his feet. Guess he'd have to deal with this, then.

"What're you gonna do?"

"Well, your teacher and I are gonna have a private conference, that's for sure."

* * *

After some confirmation with Mantis (who looked highly uncomfortable) he set the conference date with Mrs. W.

Now, the next day, he was going to visit her.

"Mr. Miller! It's nice to see you," she greeted him with a faux smile. He glared.

"Shut the door."

He sat at the desk as she did so, his narrowed eyes fixed on her the whole time.

"Your husband. What was his profession?"

"Hm? Oh, he was a scientist."

"What kind of scientist?"

"Why are you asking?"

"Listen, ma'am. Mantis told me that your husband was one of the people who experimented on him."

"... So what if he was?"

"If I hear even a little about you touching him in any way, I will report you to the authorities. And by that I mean the giant ass army still loyal to me. Not to mention all of Eli's... _friends_."

"You're threatening me."

"No shit, Sherlock."

"That is very unprofessional."

"Don't you dare touch Mantis. Then, we won't have problems. Deal?"

She let out a small noise, before nodding stiffly.

"Another thing. I think it should be important to inform you-- well, have you heard of Nyoka ya Mpembe?" He asked, smiling brightly. It was, of course, fake.

"The child soldier running through Africa?" She raised her eyebrows.

"That, my friend, is Eli. If you fuck with him too much you'll have a band of child soldiers on your ass. Good luck."

 


	27. Chapter 27

To put it very short, Eli _loved_ orchestra.

He didn't particularly think he would enjoy it when he signed up, it was just something to do since Mantis was doing it. Hell, he was pretty sure even the other kids would be terrible.

He didn't expect to get attached.

It wasn't even to just orchestra. While the other kids made school worse, what really stabbed him in the gut was the teachers.

But Mr. B, the orchestra teacher, he was different.

He was kind, and gentle. He _understood_. He was the only one in school that told him he was doing something _right_.

For a guy with an inferiority complex, being told you're doing great is the most valuable thing you can have.

Mr. B was open with them, he was the one that told him what he was feeling about everything. He never made bad news seem like their fault, and he always followed it up with an explanation.

Eli was the only bass in the orchestra. But him and Mantis really didn't like being separated. Mr. B saw that and he put them in the same private lesson group, even though they were in completely different sections.

He hadn't gotten attached because he was passionate about music, he had gotten attached because the teacher taught him _how to be_.

So he walked into orchestra with a smile on his face. Today was no different.

Since it was the last couple weeks of school, all they were doing was watching a movie. All of them would pull up chairs and lay about, one girl even brought a blanket. Eli and Mantis curled up on a bed of six chairs together, with the blond resting his head on the redhead's bony chest. And they would just watch.

But this time Mr. B stopped the movie early. He didn't look as happy as usual. He also didn't look sad. It was more... bitter-sweet.

"So, as you guys might know a while ago there was a lot of talk about budget cuts. Uh, before you start getting worried or upset, orchestra isn't getting cut. If you're signed up, you're staying."

Eli sat up, a little confused as to what was happening.

"So, I told you guys before that I was gonna be moving up with you guys and teaching at the junior high. That, uh, won't be happening." His breath caught.

"The orchestra program stayed, but my position was cut. I won't be teaching in this district at all." He felt tears start to pool in the corners of his eyes. This can't be real, right? No way.

"Uh, I have to follow this up by saying that this class was the best sixth grade class I've ever taught. You were all so passionate and I can't wait to see how far you go in life." He gave a sad smile before taking off his glasses and wiping his face.

"Do you know where you'll be teaching next year?" Vikki asked, sounding the tiniest bit choked up.

"Um, yeah, actually. I won't have to move I'm just in the other district so, I'll try and make it to concerts."

At this point Eli was really crying, tears streaming down his face in big globs. This can't be real, no way...

Every time he does something right it gets taken from him.

"So, yeah, uh, I'm still gonna be teaching for the remainder of the year, so this isn't goodbye or anything... I just thought I might as well tell you all, since there's only like, a week left of school." He glanced toward Eli, giving a comforting grin.

It didn't help much, he was still sobbing. At least he wasn't making the dumb whining noises he makes.

The bell rang and he got up quickly, packing up his things with tears still rolling down his face.

As he went to walk out of the school, for once not with Mantis, Mr. B stopped him.

"Hey, just so you know, you're gonna do fantastic. I believe in you," He smiled, "Want a chocolate covered raisin?"

Eli paused before nodding slowly, holding open his palm. He popped the raisin into his mouth with a tiny sniffle, with he teacher giving him a gentle pat on the back.

"Don't listen to what your head says, alright? Mantis is a psychic, correct? Listen to what other people's heads say, and if they don't like you, try and improve from that. You're gonna do great, kid."

He wrapped his arms around him, shoving his face in the adult's stomach.

He would miss him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Catch me casually putting the scenario I'm stuck in on my favorite characters to cope lmao  
> No really though, my orchestra teacher was the best teacher I've had in my life, everything about him made a calm environment that was just in general fun to be in. I was considering dropping orchestra and he was what kept me in. I have a problem where I feel like everything I'm doing is the wrong thing, and no matter what I am failing people that are depending on me. He never blamed any of us. Right before I'm writing this I got the news that his position got cut. I'm not feeling too good.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII HAVENT BEEN WRITING BECAUSE IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVEEEEEEEEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEN DEPRESSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDD

Eli was _tired_. So very tired. Suddenly it felt like the entire world was collapsing in on him.

He hadn't felt like this before. Sure, he was sad about Mr. B leaving. But this felt like more than that. This wasn't just his favorite teacher leaving this was something that was eating at him from the inside out, something that wouldn't stop until he was left empty.

The days left of school felt longer and longer as they went on. They wouldn't stop coming, just ticking closer and closer to the end but never reaching it. It was like it was mocking him.

Most of the endless day was spent begging to go home. He just wanted to _sleep_.

Speaking of sleep, that was practically all he did these days. If he wasn't at school he was hibernating, sleeping the days by and only emerging from his room for food. Even that was a maybe, though.

"Eli! You need to do your homework!" Kaz opened his door with no welcome, flashing the light on and off to wake the napping boy. Said boy just groaned and stuffed his face in the pillow.

"Maybe I should take you back to therapy?"

"Nooooooooooooooooo!" Eli sat up now, his hair messy from laying in bed all day.

"Do your homework, it's almost the end of the year so don't ruin your grade now." Luckily, Kaz was used to dealing with stubborn kids by now.

Eli grumbled, crawling out of bed. He grabbed his stuff out of his backpack, crawling back in bed with a pencil.

"Glasses, Eli."

"Whatever!"

The older blond walked away with a sigh. Eli grunted, shoving his glasses on his face and glaring at the paper.

"Mantis now would be a real good time to let me copy off of you."

"Eli..."

He looked up and glared at the boy that had appeared at the foot of his bed.

"Please! Just let me!"

"You have to do it yourself."

"I thought you loved me!" He placed his hand on his forehead and flung himself back on his pillow dramatically.

Mantis giggled, shuffling forward.

"It's revenge for making me wear a bunch of tank tops just so you can see my freckles."

"That was me being a fantastic friend! Everyone deserves to see your freckles! But I deserve to get a good grade on this and I know you read the teacher's mind for answers."

"No, Eli."

"Yes, Mantis."

"No."

"If you don't I'll tell everyone that... Shit. I don't have blackmail on you."

Mantis laughed, laying back next to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But its okay now lmao  
> Anyway this chapter is baaaaaadddddddddddddddddddddd


	29. Chapter 29

Eli sat around, doodling on the edge of his paper. After all, today didn't matter much. It was the last day of school and he had already finished his final for this class.

He sighed, putting his head against his desk. Mantis, who was sitting next to him, placed his hand on his thigh gently.

[Mantie I'm bored.]

_[Eli I'm literally in your head I know.]_

[What can I even do?]

_[I dunno, just wait it out?]_

[nooooooooooo]

Mantis huffed, going back to making a drawing in his notebook.

Eli sat there, picking at his nails. He was  _bored._

Then, finally, the bell rang. He shot to his feet, grabbing his binder and running out of the classroom to his homeroom. He was the first one to line up at the door for gym.

Apparently today they were doing fitness testing.

He wasn't too excited. Well, scratch that, he was very excited. This gave him the chance to prove he really was better than everyone in the class!

 _"The FitnessGram pacer test is a multi-stage aerobic-"_ He stopped listening.

As soon as it beeped he shot off, ending in a light jog. They really gave you far too much time.

He got to ninety-five before the teacher shut off the recording.

"You're all sweaty," Mantis said, pushing him away when he went for a hug.

"You love it." He hugged him anyway.

"Disgusting." He managed to make it sound playful.

"Now everyone get with partners for sit-ups, we're doing those and push-ups next."

Eli grinned at Mantis, dragging him to grab a mat.

* * *

When they got home to see Kaz standing near the door they knew something was up.

"I realized that you haven't gotten haircuts recently."

Mantis started slowly backing away, and Eli moved to protect him.

"It's time for a haircut. Mantis, you're first, your hair is a rat nest." He motioned towards the redhead with his scissors.

The poor boy grunted, walking forward solemnly.

"Do you wanna get rid of most of it?"

"I like it hanging over my face."

"I could just give you a fringe then."

"Mmmm..."

The end haircut was very short on the sides and back, with a few strands of curls falling over his face.

"Oh my god Mantis you look so _cute_!" Eli finally came out of his room only to scoop the redhead close.

"Eli it's your turn!"

"NO IT'S NOT!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey would you guys care if I made an ask blog on tumblr for this AU


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I made an actual ask blog for this https://joyofparentingau.tumblr.com/

They were going to go to the graduation ceremony but at the last second, Mantis got so anxious he started crying. And that meant Eli adamantly refused to leave. And Kaz didn't wanna take just one kid, so they ended up just not going.

But Kaz still had a job. And that meant the kids were left with V all day.

"Hey! Who wants to go dog shopping with me!?"

"I DO!"

Meanwhile at home, all four kids clattered into the room, Hal grabbing onto V's pant leg.

"Father, are we really gonna get a dog?" Eli asked, following him outside.

"Yes, but please don't tell Kaz. It's a surprise for him."

Dave giggled, bouncing on the heels of his feet.

They all loaded up in the car, with Dave in the front seat.

"Can we also get a cat?" Mantis asked softly, picking at the hem of his tank top.

"Uh, we'll see."

When they got to the pet store they were all practically off the walls, Eli leading the way inside with Mantis shortly behind him being dragged by the hand.

They opened the door with a surprising amount of confidence, considering that they were definitely gonna get killed for this later.

When they entered near everyone gravitated toward the dog section. After all, that was what they were after.

Eli and Mantis, however, went over to the cats.

And actually _screamed_.

As soon as they did V and a couple workers ran over, visibly concerned, only to find Eli near tears holding a cat. After somehow getting in the pen.

"Eli! What are you doing!?"

"She's so _soft_."

"Why did you scream!?"

"Father, can we please adopt her?"

"Eli, don't scream for the love of god I thought you were _hurt_."

"Look at her! I want her!"

So apparently Eli is very stubborn.

They left the pet store with a new white cat in hand. And a very _very_ happy Eli.

"I'm gonna name her Snowball."

"Why?"

"Because she looks like a little snowball!"

V chuckled, loading all the caring materials into the trunk before picking up the kitten, which was about the size of his hand.

"You boys will take care of it, right?"

"Yes!"

That night Kaz ended up cussing them all out, but when he threatened to return her, Eli promptly burst into tears.

So basically, summer was going great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I WROTE THIS ALL IN LIKE LESS THAN 2 HOURS I WANNA DIE I FORGOT I HAD TO UPLOAD SOMETHING TODAY UUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


End file.
